Hermione's Suicide
by Leiria
Summary: Hermione's shocking final action leaves everyone confused. Why did she do it? Why did she suddenly give up and end a temporary problem with a final solution? Harry, Ron, and Draco deal with the aftermath as they go into their 7th year at Hogwarts. AU h/d
1. Chapter 1

**I do not own Harry Potter or anything related to it. They belong to someone else whose mind is absolutely amazing. JKR, You ROCK!**

**Hermione's Suicide**

**Chapter 1  
**

**Dark red blood covered white innocent hands and the knife clutched so desperately in one of them. The thick liquid covered the porcelain sink and formed a smeared hand print on the glassy surface of the mirror in front of her.**

**Arms had become numb with pain—she couldn't feel her fingers—she couldn't feel her heart.**

**Dull brown eyes looked up from the drastic red-on-white and met the eyes of the reflection behind the blood.**

**She swayed perilously and gripped the edge of the tiled counter for the second time, dropping the knife that landed with a soft thud next to her bare foot.**

**The only other sound in the room was that of the water rushing to fill the tub behind her before she bled to death on her own. The water seemed to be racing her fiercely beating heart as it pumped to get the blood out, knowing that the time had come to let go. The time had come to say goodbye to the cruel world that this one had been revealed to be.**

**She turned to the tub as the feeling of lightheadedness passed. She stepped over her clothes as she turned off the water to the tub before stepping in. She gasped at the extreme heat that greeted her as she slowly lowered herself into the scalding water.**

**She relaxed against the back of the tub as the water turned a deep red, drawing the rest of the blood out of her. She closed her eyes against the color, not willing to see it anymore. Not willing to see anything anymore…**

"Did you have any idea?"

"Who would have thought she'd do something like this?"

"Harry and Ron are still…they've hardly spoken to anyone…"

"Can you blame them? They've just lost their best friend!"

Harry Potter listened to the voices as they passed by the room he shared with his best friend Ron Weasley at Grimmauld Place. Did they have to discuss the events of Hermione's suicide in hushed voices the whole world could hear? If so, did they have to do it near the two 17 year-olds?

Harry felt his heavy eyelids close as he prepared himself against the tears that would not come. He knew the tears needed to be shed, but he also knew that crying was not something he did. He wasn't about to start.

His shoulders shook with tear-less sobs over the death of the one steady person he had always been able to count on. Why did she die? Why did she feel the need to kill herself? What made life so bad for her?

He buried his face in his pillow and screamed. "WHY?" he shouted into it.

That was when the tears came, flooding him with their presence all at once. He wept, for the first time in his life, all alone in that dank and dusty room.

His tears were not just for Hermione—why give her that much? She was the one who couldn't handle the war. She was the one who refused to see. _She_ was the one who was too weak to keep going.

Harry shed his tears for his parents, for Cedric, Cho, for all of the people lost and who have lost, and, most of all, for Sirius.

It was just over a year now, since the only family Harry had left was murdered. Harry had gotten his revenge on Bellatrix Lestrange only a few months ago, by casting the same curse and causing her to fall to her death, some hundred feet below.

Hermione and Ron had been there, with him, as well as a few members of the DA (which had a few Slytherin additions in the forms of Draco Malfoy, Pansy Parkinson and Blaise Zabini).

Under the headmaster's tutelage, Harry had mastered Occlumency, however that did not stop some images getting through to him, and when the orders for Bellatrix were gifted to Harry, he could not stop himself from avenging his godfather.

The hand on Harry's shoulder startled him and he froze, pillow soaked, throat raw, eyes red, mid sob.

"Hey," said a soft voice as the person it belonged to sat on the floor. "It's about time," he continued.

Harry knew who the person was and found he didn't give a damn what the Slytherin thought. If crying was a weakness…more fuel to the already raging fire….

However when the warm hand found his cold one, Harry couldn't help but care. He looked at the other seventh-year-to-be through blurry red-rimmed eyes and let out one final, quiet sob. "Why?" he whispered.

The blond shook his head. "No idea," he said softly. "There are a lot of reasons why, Harry, even if we never know them. All we can do is continue to live and fight, no matter what the odds are."

The door to the bedroom opened and the redheaded Ronald Weasley walked in, carrying three letters.

"Book lists," he explained, handing two of them to the outstretched pale hand.

The Slytherin took the letters and passed one of them behind him. Harry took the offered letter and sat up as he opened it, only to find the biggest shock of his life.

"What?" the Slytherin at his feet asked.

"I made Head Boy," Harry whispered, still in shock.

The appointment didn't make any sense to Harry; after all, the headmaster had confessed that he had though that Harry would be in over his head with prefect duties.

"Maybe Dumbledore's trying to make up for not making you a prefect," Ron said with a shrug. "Wonder who Head Girl will be…"

A heavy silence filled the room as all three boys knew to whom the job belonged. However, as she is no longer of this existence, she can't be Head Girl.

"I'll bet it's going to be a Ravenclaw," the Slytherin muttered, feeling the need to break the unbearable silence. He stood and walked over to the window. The last of the sunlight lit up his face and made his blond hair glow. "They're the only House with any hope."

"Is it possible for me to refuse this?" Harry asked, lying back down. He put his hands over his face and sighed deeply. "I can't do it…not when she should be there as well."

"I don't think so," Ron said from his spot on his bed. "Bill tried, he didn't want it. They made him do it anyway though. He wanted to have fun his last year, but they got him first."

"It'll help you with the DA, Harry," the blond said, still gazing out of the window to the darkening landscape. "If the Head Boy is leading classes, you're bound to get more support."

"Oh," Ron said suddenly. "Malfoy, your girlfriend sent you a letter today too. It's in the kitchen."

"She is _not_ my girlfriend, Weasley," Draco snapped, glaring at Ron. "She never has been, and never will be either," he muttered, briskly walking out of the room.

"Damn," Ron muttered. "What crawled up his arse and died?"

"Draco's gay," Harry answered from under the pillow he had thrown over his head during Draco's pep talk.

"Oh," Ron said, making a mental note to stay out of reach from the Slytherin.

"I made Quidditch captain!" he said, trying to brighten the mood. "You're coming back, right?" he asked.

Harry nodded. He needed Quidditch to take his mind off of the hell that had become his life since his eleventh birthday.

"Mum wants to know if you're coming down to dinner," asked Ron's youngest sibling and only biological sister Ginny Weasley. "She says it's just about done, so you'll have to let her know quick."

"Tell her we'll be there," Ron answered. Ginny nodded and left, leaving Ron to look at Harry and wonder if the other teen would ever eat again.

Harry hadn't eaten much since Sirius' death and had nearly quit eating with Hermione's death. Ron had to admit that his own appetite had taken a dent with the loss of both of them, but he didn't understand Harry at all. How could someone just stop eating?

But then again, there were times when Harry just wasn't Harry.

Ron sighed and headed down to the kitchen, passing the runaway heir as he descended the staircase. Remembering Harry's words, Ron made sure to stay out of Draco's reach.

Everyone was pleased to hear that Harry had gotten to be Head Boy—just like his father. The atmosphere was quickly subdued when the subject of Head Girl approached the surface again.

That was when both Draco and Ron broke the silence by announcing their Quidditch captain status.

Cheers and smiles were forced to come back to the surface as the seventh years were congratulated on their various achievements. Everyone was careful to ensure that the subject of Hermione and Head Girl stayed well out of the kitchen.

The night before the return to Hogwarts came far sooner than any of the four school-aged occupants of the house would have liked.

The three boys stayed up late, knowing they would regret it, having to get up early the next morning, but not caring. Both Ron and Draco felt that Harry was quickly reaching the edge and needed to be carefully watched for signs of his own suicide. Something neither of the others could allow to happen for their own reasons.

Ron had been the first to fall asleep that night, leaving Harry and Draco alone. They sat rather close to each other, and that wasn't just because of the size of Harry's bed.

"Why'd you run?" Harry asked in a quiet voice as to not wake his snoring best friend.

"I would have thought that was obvious, Harry," came the cryptic answer. Draco was very good at giving everything away, and yet still saying nothing at the same time. It was something he was quite proud of.

"I know you hate your father, and I understand; I get that you want to be your own person, I respect that, but what I don't get is why run? You've fought him for so long, dealt with everything for so long, so why stop fighting?"

Draco sighed and pulled on the cuffs of his sleeves. He sighed then pulled the left one up to his elbow. He turned his arm over, exposing Harry to the milky white soft flesh. Harry, who had actually been expecting to see the Dark Mark, looked rather surprised by the absence of it.

"Don't let your eyes fool you, Harry, it's there," Draco said, somehow knowing what was going through Harry's head. He outlined a shadow with the forefinger of his right hand and Harry saw it clearly. "He didn't finish it," Draco said quietly. "He started it, but I managed to get away. I still don't know how I managed that…. I went to Diagon Alley and there you were…. Ready to forgive, forget, and save…."

The silence grew uncomfortable before Harry allowed himself to do what he had wanted to do since Draco came to stay with them at Grimmauld Place. Something that was probably best never happening at all….

He looked away from the aristocrat's arm and met his diamond gray eyes. Then, slowly, not sure if this was right, he moved to his knees. Slower still, he reached out to Draco and wiped the baby fine blond strands of hair out of his face.

He watched as Draco's eyes flickered down to his slightly parted lips before returning to the emerald eyes possessed only by Harry himself.

Harry had let his hand linger on Draco's cheek. Draco had smirked slightly at Harry before turning his head and, still looking at Harry, kissed his palm.

That was all Harry needed. That simple gesture of acceptance sent all of the blood in Harry's body to his groin and his instincts became far louder than his voice of reason.

Quickly, Harry had Draco locked in a kiss, fighting for control.

Smirking, Draco broke the kiss and began placing kisses on Harry's neck. Harry let out a low moan of pleasure, only distantly aware of his sleeping best friend a few feet away.

_25-12-1996_

_Dear Diary_

_My mother sent this to me for Christmas this year. I don't really know why, perhaps it is just my unannounced need to get everything out before I explode._

_I found out something today, something I never wanted to know. Corruption in this world goes far beyond the Ministry, it seems, and has reached Hogwarts in the guise of our latest DADA professor—Abram—who is also a member of the Order._

_I heard the two of them, Dumbledore and that witch, talking about Harry. Oh, it was awful! They kept referring to Harry as an __object__! A __tool!__ And they said they would use Ron and I as pawns to get Harry to do what they want! _

_They know they're losing him._

_And Cho has lost him. I saw the final result of their relationship as I escaped the professors' conversation._

_Harry and Cho were arguing—again. They're always arguing. It seems Harry's shut her out again—no surprise. He's been shutting us all out lately. I had just turned the corner when I saw it. Cho asked him why, Harry answered in two simple words I didn't hear but knew what they were. Cho ran off crying._

_As she nearly knocked into me, Harry saw. I stared at him, bewildered after their confrontation and what I had overheard with Abram and Dumbledore._

_The way he looked at me…. It was as if I should already know what those two words were without having to ask._

_Indeed I do know._

_Harry's out._

_Harry's gay._

_Cho blames herself._

_Hermione_


	2. Chapter 2

"You want us to _what?"_ Hermione demanded. "How can you be asking that of us? You, of all people, Dumbledore, should know how Harry reacts in situations where he is cornered. I won't do it. Ron won't either."

"Miss Granger, you must understand the importance of Harry's roll in this war. Were you not to do this he—"

"Would be better off!" Hermione yelled. She stared at the headmaster and the Defense professor in furry. "I can't believe you're even considering this, Headmaster. I can't believe I ever trusted you."

"You've known this was coming, Miss Granger," Professor Abram smirked. "You've known since Christmas when you listened to a conversation between the Headmaster and myself. Don't tell me you'll go back on your word now."

"Harry means more to me than my stupid name," Hermione spat. "You can do whatever you want to that, I don't care. But you're not going to have me help you destroy the best thing this world has to offer! You're not going to have me help you take his life and mold it into what you want it to be! I'm not going to do it, and no matter what you do, Ron won't either. I can guarantee that."

"Very well, Miss Granger," Dumbledore said sadly. "It seems you've made your decision."

"Yes, I have."

The return to Hogwarts had been hard for all of them. Harry's Head Student duties would be shared with Ravenclaw Padma Patil and the twelve prefects (Hermione had been replaced with Lavender Brown and Lisa Turpin took over Padma's vacated place) were all shocked to see a non-prefect chosen to be Head Boy.

They were further shocked to see the absence of Hermione.

When seventh year Hufflepuff prefect Ernie Macmillan mentioned this during his surprise at the badge on Padma's robes, Harry excused himself from the compartment.

Draco took charge then, recognizing the need to inform the other and knowing that neither Harry nor Ron were capable of doing so themselves.

"I take it you haven't heard," Draco said as he watched Ron follow Harry out. "Hermione Granger…died shortly after the start of the holidays."

Everyone in the room audibly gasped.

"She _died?_" Padma asked, horrified.

Draco shuffled nervously on his feet. "Suicide," he whispered.

More gasps.

"How do _you_ know all of this?" Anthony Goldstein demanded. "No offence."

"I found her," Draco said quickly, the sudden need to join Harry and Ron overwhelming him.

He closed the door behind him and leaned against it, very well aware that those still behind him were likely to be listening. Draco let out a shaky breath and looked to his friends for support. Was this what it was like to openly care? Was it always so hard?

"What did you say?" Harry asked in a low voice.

"Only the basics," Draco answered. "Is it always this hard?" he asked suddenly. "Caring and actually letting it out?"

Harry nodded and sank to the floor, burying his head in his arms.

"Sometimes it isn't," Ron said softly as he gazed out through the window. "Sometimes you get lucky."

Ron waked back in to the compartment, leaving Harry and Draco alone again.

Draco sat down next to Harry and sighed. He leaned his head back and listened to everything going on around him. Harry was crying again.

"Harry?"

Harry shook his head and looked up, unseeing, at the door opposite them, wondering what was going on in there. "I wish I knew why," he said yet again. This time, he wasn't just referring to Hermione's suicide.

"Don't we all?" Draco asked dryly. He studied Harry a moment and could not fail to notice that the Head Boy's gaze continued to linger on the door to the prefect's compartment.

"Patil can take care of them, you know," Draco said, trying to draw Harry's attention away from his pain. "She knows what to do."

Harry nodded and sighed. "Hopefully she's good at that…. Doing more than she has to, I mean."

"What are you talking about?" Draco asked, suddenly worried that Harry was thinking of following in Hermione's footsteps.

"I don't think I can do this," he whispered.

"Yes you can," Draco insisted, a lot more forcibly than he had intended. He couldn't let Harry even think about doing as Hermione had done. He couldn't let Harry even consider giving it all up.

Harry's eyes snapped over to Draco, the shock on his face rather apparent. "You really think I can do that job—a job she should have—now that she's gone and offed herself? Do you honestly think I can do something she would have done and do it well? I don't."

"Shows how well you know yourself, Harry," Draco muttered, forcing himself to look away from Harry. Those damn green eyes…. Draco was sure they could see thorough anything, even if Harry couldn't.

"Huh?" Harry asked, sounding rather stupid, even to his own ears.

"You don't get it do you?" Draco demanded, turning back to look at Harry again. "You're strong, you're the only one who really can do anything. You're an excellent flier—makes me wonder why you're not Quidditch captain—you're the best duelist I've ever seen, and I've grown up watching Death Eaters. You are one of the most passionate people I've ever met. You're self-sacrificing, determined, resourceful, noble…you're everything people dream about, Harry," Draco said, his voice full of emotion even he didn't know he was capable of. "And you're far too stubborn to fail."

"I don't want this," Harry muttered, taking off his badge. He looked at it a moment then handed it to Draco. "You deserve it, not me," he said, standing.

"No," Draco protested, pulling himself up as well. He pinned the badge back onto the front of Harry's robes. "And don't you ever take it off again. You deserve this. You keep this."

Harry was grateful to return to his old dormitory that night. He changed quickly and flung himself on his bed long before his dorm-mates made their way up the staircase.

Harry was surprised, and grateful, that the headmaster hadn't mentioned the new appointments or absences. He didn't think he'd be able to handle one more person mentioning Hermione's absence. On the train, at the table, again in the common room…Harry wondered if Hermione had known what an important part of this school she was. Even people from other Houses noticed that she was gone.

"Harry?"

"Yeah?" Harry asked from behind his closed scarlet curtains.

"McGonagall want's to talk to you," Ron informed him quietly.

Harry sighed and got out of bed. After pulling a shirt on, he followed Ron down the stairs to see the Head of Gryffindor standing in the common room.

"Professor?" Harry asked as he approached her at the fireplace.

"I hear you don't want to the job of Head Boy, Potter," she said softly, announcing the reason for her untimely presence.

"Nope," Harry answered rather rudely. "I hate the badge already."

"Why?" she asked, turning away from the fireplace to face him.

"Hermione," Harry answered simply, feeling that the one word provided all the explanation needed.

The Transfiguration professor nodded her understanding. "You may be interested to know that Miss Granger's choice is precisely what led Professor Snape to nominate you for the position. You won the vote by one person."

"Then take it back and give it to the other person, please!" Harry begged. If it was just one vote….

"Draco Malfoy has already declined," Professor McGonagall confessed. "We discussed the matter when he brought your feelings to the attention of his Head of House."

Harry made a noise of contempt at hearing that Draco was the one that ratted him out.

"You will be expected to perform—"

"No," Harry said strongly. "Hogwarts can either be short the Head Boy this year, or you can find a new one."

Harry turned and walked back to his dormitory without another word.

Harry's refusal of duties caused an uproar in both the students and the staff. There were a few, such as Ron, who blamed Snape for the problem, being that Snape was the one to suggest that Harry become Head Boy in the first place. These people sided with Harry on his decision to refuse the job. Others in the school thought that Harry should just tough it up and take the job, but these were the people who didn't know what had befallen Hermione and thought that she had just decided to refrain from attending her last year of Hogwarts. It happened to a lot of students, why should she be any different? After all, these people thought that she had been accepted to some other school that was better and she was continuing her magical career early.

Padma, it seemed, took the responsibility she had been appointed with, as well as all of the jobs Harry had dumped into her lap, with a grain of sand. She did well as Head Student (the name had been unofficially changed) and the student body admired her for it. Many of them said that she had been kept under Hermione's shadow and that it was a good thing the Gryffindor had gone to that other school so that Padma could have her share of the limelight.

It took Harry months to get the DA up and running for it's third year. He had been so busy with Quidditch practice and homework, not to mention his after school training with Professor Abram (the only Defense professor to return for a second year in a row since before Quirrell).

The first meeting of the DA wasn't until early November. Harry watched as all of those who were still at the school for the previous DA returned, each of them bringing someone younger with them.

Harry stood up at the front of the room and watched each of them find someone to work with.

Draco leaned against the table a few feet behind Harry and watched the Boy Who Lived very closely.

Both boys walked between the students to watch them as they practiced the newest spell of Harry's teaching: the Disillusionment Charm. Each group was supposed to be casting the charm on an object of their choice. Not many were getting it though….

Draco stayed after the meeting had ended to help Harry clean up and restore many of the objects that had been, in some way, modified by the charm.

Draco wanted nothing more than to take Harry into his arms and kiss away his problems, but he held himself back. They hadn't been alone together in months and hadn't been closer than a foot since that last night of August that hadn't escalated to anything beyond an extraordinarily great snog session for fear of Ron's waking up.

They hadn't even talked about it.

They weren't even talking right now.

"It was a good meeting," Draco said, desperate for Harry's attention. He placed the last restored object on the table. "There were a lot of new faces."

"You and Pansy sure had a lot to talk about," Harry said in a low voice as he turned away from Draco.

"We hadn't really had a chance to catch up since I ran away. She and Blaise were curious about how the summer was."

"Do they know?" Harry asked.

Draco didn't even need to ask about what Harry was talking about.

"Yes," Draco said softly. "I told Pansy in a letter just after…."

"Everyone came back, did you notice?" Harry asked, skillfully changing the subject.

"Do you think it'll last after we're gone?" Draco asked, following Harry's lead. Anything to keep the pain away….

"I'm thinking of having Ginny take over teaching for me. I still have to talk to her about it, but I think she might do it. If not, I'll find someone else. They can pass the job on when they leave…. It'll be better for the school if the DA stays."

"Not to mention the general public and everyone's grades," Draco said with a small chuckle.

"Maybe," Harry agreed, sounding thoroughly depressed.

"What's wrong?" Draco asked, sitting on one of the beanbags in the room.

Harry shook his head but Draco could easily see that he was close to tears again.

Closer than Draco thought, for suddenly tears were falling down Harry's face and a sob was escaping him.

Draco rushed to Harry, the need for comforting the other teen far surpassing the, as of yet, undying need to be proper.

Harry tightly wrapped his arms around Draco's waist and continued to cry.

"Shh," Draco whispered in Harry's ear. "It's all alright," he swore. "It's all going to be alright."

"When?" Harry asked thickly.

"I don't know," Draco confessed. "Soon, I promise."

Unable to resist, Draco kissed Harry's forehead.

"Draco?" Harry asked.

"Yeah?"

"What are we?" he asked. "We're not just friends, so…."

"We are what we want to be, Harry," came Draco's cryptic answer. He knew exactly what he wanted, but he wasn't sure about Harry.

"If I ask you if you'll be my boyfriend, what will you do?"

"Gladly accept," Draco answered honestly. "And tell you that you sound like a pre-teen for having to ask."

Harry chuckled. "Can I ask it anyway?"

"How about we just skip that part?" Draco asked. "We'll pretend that you did and my answer is yes, so here we are, a couple."

_12-31-96_

_Dear Diary_

_ I've just found out that Cho Chang has left the school. She's gone! No one knows where she went or if she's coming back, but I heard Padma Patil talking to her sister about it at lunch today. Did she leave because of Harry? Did she actually leave because he told her the truth? I guess I shouldn't be surprised. After her tragic love life, it seems only inevitable that she would do something rash, such as throw away her schooling, because the man she's in love with loves men._

_It's enough to make me laugh._

_Professor Abram talked to me today as well. She saw me on Christmas when she was talking to Dumbledore. She said that if I told Harry about anything that I had overheard I would be expelled and she would personally ensure that my name was further disgraced and that I would be labeled as the one who wanted to put Harry out of the picture for my own greedy reasons. I can't believe Dumbledore would hire someone as vile as that woman to teach us. It almost makes me wonder if the Ministry is yet again interfering with school affairs._

_But if that's the case, why would Abram and Dumbledore be talking about the Order and using Harry as a tool? I'll have to look into this further…._

_Hermione_


	3. Chapter 3

**Three new and unexpected additions were made to the DA the month before the summer break began. The three of them stood behind Harry as he needlessly introduced them. Everyone in the school knew them. Everyone in the school had been tormented by any of the three on more than one occasion.**

**Draco Malfoy, Pansy Parkinson, and Blaise Zabini.**

**It was not Blaise's presence, or even Draco's that surprised Hermione (she knew exactly what he was doing there). It was Pansy's.**

**Brown eyes met black eyes and the two sixteen year old girls stared at each other in fascination, unable to look away….**

**What would Pansy and her friends bring to the DA? What would they bring to the war? What would they do if they knew of the corruption? Were they a part of the corruption?**

Harry sat alone in his dormitory late that night looking at a picture taken at the end of the term last year. He, Ron, and Hermione had all been smiling then. They'd all been fairly happy…. Was she already planning her suicide?, Harry wondered. Did she know her end was near?

Dear Merlin why the hell did she do it?

"Harry?"

"What?" Harry asked, his voice cracking with emotion.

Ron sat down next to Harry and took the photograph. "I remember this," he said thoughtfully. "To think, three weeks later…

"Malfoy's outside," he said quickly, changing the subject. "He says he wants to talk to you."

"Are you talking to him now then?" Harry asked, knowing that Ron hadn't really said much to Draco since he learned that Draco was gay.

"I was on my way back from the library. He caught up with me as I was about to come in here."

"Do you know what he wants?" Harry asked.

Ron shook his head. He put the picture down and stood and walked over to his own bed. "No," he sighed, laying down. "But it seems important."

Harry nodded and left.

"Hello," Draco said, giving Harry a hug.

Harry sighed heavily and wrapped his arms around the other man. "Hey," he said softly.

"Come out with me," Draco said. "Let's get out of the school for a while."

"Where to?" Harry asked.

"I don't know," Draco replied. "Anywhere but here. Seventh years are free to come and go as they please, so I thought…. We should celebrate," he said trying to lighten the mood. "After all, today was a good day."

Harry nodded. "Alright," he agreed. "I need to go get something really quick, I'll be right back."

"I have to wait out here?" Draco asked with a sigh.

"Do you want to come in?" Harry asked. "The Tower's nothing like the dungeon, but it's home."

"You know what our common room looks like?" Draco asked.

Harry chuckled slightly. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"But we're not allowed into other common rooms."

"That's actually not a rule," Harry said, surprising the Prefect. "I looked it up. It's just not something that happens very often because this is Hogwarts and inter-house stuff doesn't usually happen. Do you want to come in or not?"

"Sure," Draco shrugged. "What are you getting?"

Harry shook his head and turned to open the portrait hole.

"What's he doing here?" Ron asked as Harry entered the dormitory with Draco right behind him.

"He didn't want to wait outside," Harry answered, going to his trunk.

"But…isn't this against the rules?"

"Nope," Harry answered simply. "Just doesn't happen very often."

Harry discretely pocketed his moneybag and pulled out a book from his trunk. If they were going into Hogsmeade, then Harry needed to talk to the owners of Zonko's about disappearing ink.

"What's that?" both Ron and Draco asked, seeing what Harry was holding.

"I think it's Hermione's diary," Harry answered softly. "But there's nothing written in it, or at least there _seems_ to be nothing written in it. I'm wondering if it's disappearing ink or something. I know I've seen her writing in it before…."

"Where do you want to go to check it out?" Draco asked. "Scrivenshaft's, or Zonko's?"

Harry shrugged. "Either one will work."

"Sorry we can't help you," Mr. Scrivenshaft said softly, handing the diary back to Harry. "If there was anything written in it, I suggest a revealing spell. If nothing else works, we do have these erasers—they're ideal for exposing invisible ink."

"I'll take an eraser then," Harry said, his voice full of hopelessness.

"That'll be five Knuts."

"Invisible ink, you say?" Mr. Zonko asked, looking through the diary. "We sell it, but our inks never last this long, if it is as old as you say it is. The longest our inks have been known to last are only two months at most. Usually they become visible before then, however. I'm sorry, Mr. Potter, I don't think there's anything I can do for you."

"Thanks anyway," Harry sighed, taking the diary back. He and Draco walked out of the shop together and up the road to the Three Broomsticks.

They sat down at one of the tables near the back. What Draco had hoped to be a relaxing night had turned into a search for answers. Harry pulled out the eraser and began to rub it against the first page of the diary.

"I'm going to go get a butterbeer, you want one?"

Harry nodded, his mind mostly on his erasing.

Draco gazed sadly at his boyfriend for a moment before rising to purchase the butterbeers with whatever money he had left. After school supplies and renting a room from the Leaky Cauldron for three days, he had very little money left over. Somehow he was sure Harry knew that, and that was why he had grabbed his money from his trunk.

Harry sighed and threw down his eraser as Draco came back, a butterbeer in each hand.

"Not working?" he asked, handing Harry one of the bottles.

Harry shook his head. "I'll erase a hole in the page before I find out what she wrote."

"If it is invisible ink, she's gotten a good quality. Obviously not a Zonko's product. After all, you said she started this at Christmas, right?"

Harry nodded. "At least that's the first time I ever saw her with a diary. She seemed pretty upset that day…. That was the day I told Cho that I was gay. Hermione saw the whole thing—she looked pretty upset about something. I'm sure it wasn't because of what she'd seen; she saw it coming. She knew I was gay long before I ever told anyone…."

"So you think she was upset about something else then?" Draco asked.

Harry nodded. "She was completely open about things like that. She said once that she thought she may have been a lesbian herself."

"Where did you find the journal?" Draco asked, his eyes on the blank pages.

"The day she killed herself, I saw her walking out of our room at Grimmauld. She was crying, but she wouldn't talk to me. She ran down the hall and I walked into the room. This was on my bed. It was blank then, as it is now, but…she didn't leave this for nothing," Harry said suddenly. "There's something in here that she wants me to see, I know it."

"Then why can't you read it?" Draco asked softly, covering Harry's hand with his.

Harry shook his head wearily. "I don't know, but I know that something's wrong. She wouldn't have left me this if she didn't want me to find something. She knew…I don't know what she knew, but I do know that shortly after Christmas her trust and confidence in Abram dramatically decreased. I'm guessing that there's something in here about her."

The diary began to faintly glow. Both Harry and Draco were instantly drawn to it, and both were amazed when blue ink began to appear.

_Dear Diary 12-25-1996_

_My mother sent this to me for Christmas this year. I don't really know why, perhaps it is just my unannounced need to get everything out before I explode._

_I found out something today, something I never wanted to know. Corruption in this world goes far beyond the Ministry, it seems, and has reached Hogwarts in the guise of our latest DADA professor—Abram—who is also a member of the Order._

_I heard the two of them, Dumbledore and that witch, talking about Harry. Oh, it was awful! They kept referring to Harry as an __object__! A __tool!__ And they said they would use Ron and I as pawns to get Harry to do what they want! _

"What?" Harry gasped. "I'm an _object?_" he asked, his voice rising in anger. "A bloody _tool?"_

"Harry, calm down," Draco pleaded urgently. They _were_ in the middle of the Three Broomsticks after all, and the rest of Hogsmeade didn't need to know what was written in a dead woman's diary.

"What did she hear?" Harry demanded. "And _Dumbledore_ knows?"

Harry slammed the book shut and stormed out of the pub; furious and ready to kill someone in order to get some answers. Draco was left to follow in his dust.

Harry slammed open the door to the headmaster's office, surprisingly unsurprised to see Professor Abram standing in the middle of the room, apparently in the middle of a sentence.

"I'm a _tool?"_ Harry demanded, storming up to the headmaster's desk. "What the _bloody_ hell did she mean? What did she know? What are you hiding from me?"

"Harry," the headmaster said, a look of confusion on his face, "I don't know what you're talking about."

"The _HELL_ you don't!" Harry bellowed, slamming his fists on the headmaster's desk. "BOTH OF YOU! YOU WERE TALKING ABOUT USING ME! SHE _HEARD_ YOU! I WAN'T SOME ANSWERS _NOW!"_

"You are referring to a conversation Miss Granger overheard between myself and Professor Abram near Christmas of last year, are you not?" Dumbledore asked calmly. Harry stared. "Miss Granger was mistaken in what she heard that day, Harry," he said, trying to calm the boy. "You are not a tool, and we are not using you as such. Please, return to your dormitory, Professor Abram and I are in the middle of something important."

Harry stared into the headmaster's eyes for a moment before he accepted the fact that he wasn't going to get any answers. "Fine," he spat. He pushed himself away from the desk. "Next time, don't lie to me."

He walked out of the office then, many of the portraits staring at him in shock, not knowing how he knew that the headmaster had been lying.

"How does he know?" Professor Abram asked as soon as the door was shut. "Granger is dead, she can't have told him."

"Donna, Miss Granger was a highly talented witch. If she wanted Harry to know something, not even death would be able to stop her from getting the message to him. As for now, we should focus our attention on Mr. Weasley and Mr. Malfoy. They are perhaps the only two close enough to Harry to influence him in any way."

_1-3-97_

_Dear Diary_

_I'm not sure what they're planning to do, but I know it's big. They wouldn't be so keen on enlisting the help of both Ron and myself if it were not. I won't do it. I know they're only planning on using Harry, and I know it is not in the best interest of the war. This is something that is beneficial to Dumbledore himself, no doubt, though I can't see why he would be interested in personal gain. In the past he has only been interested in the well being of Harry and the rest of us. Perhaps it __is__for the best of the school, though I don't see how anything would be in the best interest of anything without Harry._

_I don't even know what it is that they're planning. But Abram, she said that as soon as he was out of the way…. As soon as Ron and I got him out of the way their plan could commence. I'm terrified. I want to tell Harry, but…I can't. I don't know what it is, but I can't seem to tell him, no matter how hard I try. I want to tell him to beware of Abram and Dumbledore. I want to tell him that he should never go anywhere alone or trust either Ron or myself if we tell him to go somewhere alone. _

_I'm scared. I don't think I've ever been so terrified for Harry in all the time I've known him, and I've been plenty scared for him loads of times._

_I don't know what to do anymore…_

_Hermione_


	4. Chapter 4

**Hermione and Ron looked at Harry in shock.**

**"You mean, you're _friends?"_ she asked.**

**Harry nodded. "Draco and I, well, we had a little chat the other day, and—well, I wouldn't really call us _friends,_" he said, "but we're not fighting any more. We've…we've reached an understanding."**

**"Harry, have you gone mad?" Ron demanded. "You know the second you turn your back he's going to hand you right over to either his dad or to You Know Who himself."**

**Harry grew quiet for a moment. "I'd take that over constantly fighting with him any day," Harry said softly. "I'd take having to watch my back, to risk everything, to save the life of one person, because Merlin knows I've been the cause of enough death."**

"**Harry, you haven't—"**

"**My parents wouldn't have died if it weren't for me, Hermione," Harry nearly yelled. "Cedric wouldn't have been in the graveyard if I hadn't insisted that we take the cup together; Sirius wouldn't have gone to the Ministry of Magic if I hadn't. I may not have been the one to do the killing, Hermione, but I was the reason they were in danger, so don't you dare tell me I wasn't the cause or that I wasn't the one responsible."**

**Hermione's eyes burned with tears. **_**If only he could see,**_** she thought desperately.**

"Harry?"

Harry looked up from his half-eaten breakfast to see Professor McGonagall standing in front of him. "Yeah?" he asked.

"Headmaster Dumbledore would like a word with you after breakfast," she informed him.

Harry's face hardened. "Ask him how it feels to want," he said angrily, getting up and walking out of the Great Hall. Draco saw and followed, not having had a word with Harry since the night before.

"Harry," Draco said, jogging slightly to catch up to him. "Harry, wait."

Harry stopped walking and turned to face Draco as he caught up with him. "What?" he asked, surprisingly calm for the amount of anger in his veins.

"What happened?" he asked. "In Dumbledore's office," he clarified. "And just now with McGonagall."

"Dumbledore denied everything," Harry said softly, beginning to walk again. He led the way to the lake and sat down under one of the trees. "He said that I wasn't an object or a tool and that I would never be used as one. For the first time, I don't believe him," Harry said looking into Draco's eyes. "He didn't even look at me when he said that. That's the first time I've ever felt like this with someone I trusted. I don't know what to do…."

"So what did McGonagall want with you?" Draco asked.

"She was delivering a message from Dumbledore. Apparently he wants to talk to me."

"Are you going to talk to him?"

"I told her to ask him how it felt to want. I don't like this feeling. It's like they're not telling me something that is going to change my life forever, and I don't think I can take something like that twice. It was bad enough when Dumbledore lied to me about the prophecy, you know? I really don't believe him and that's what hurts. I thought I could trust him, but apparently not."

"Did you mention Hermione's journal?" Draco asked, rubbing circles on Harry's back, trying to calm him down.

Harry sighed. "I told him I knew about something—I didn't mention the journal, no—and he said that Hermione had overheard a conversation between him and Abram that she had misunderstood. But if that was the case, why didn't Hermione go back to trusting Abram again? She and Dumbledore would have set Hermione right, I know it! Maybe there's more that what's going on. Maybe she was threatened. Maybe it's in the journal…."

Harry pulled the journal out of his bag and flipped through the pages. The rest of the first entrance was clear now, but Harry ignored it. Draco assumed he'd already read it.

The next page was also clear. Harry paused and looked over the entry.

_12-21-96_

_Dear Diary _

_I've just found out that Cho Chang has left the school. She's gone! No one knows where she went or if she's coming back, but I heard Padma Patil talking to her sister about it at lunch today. Did she leave because of Harry? Did she actually leave because he told her the truth? I guess I shouldn't be surprised. After her tragic love life, it seems only inevitable that she would do something rash, such as throw away her schooling, because the man she's in love with loves men._

_It's enough to make me laugh._

_Professor Abram talked to me today as well. She saw me on Christmas when she was talking to Dumbledore. She said that if I told Harry about anything that I had overheard I would be expelled and she would personally ensure that my name was further disgraced and that I would be labeled as the one who wanted to put Harry out of the picture for my own greedy reasons. I can't believe Dumbledore would hire someone as vile as that woman to teach us. It almost makes me wonder if the Ministry is yet again interfering with school affairs._

_But if that's the case, why would Abram and Dumbledore be talking about the Order and using Harry as a tool? I'll have to look into this further…._

_Hermione_

"Abram said that she would make sure Hermione was _expelled?"_ Harry asked in shock. "Dumbledore _is_ lying to me, I know it. Why else would this have happened? Hermione wouldn't lie, not to herself and not to me. She heard something and they don't want me to know about it."

"But she hasn't said _what_ it is that they said," Draco pointed out. "Doesn't that seem odd?"

Harry shook his head. "She was always cryptic like that," Harry said softly. "She would only tell us what we needed to know until it got to the point when we needed to know everything. She was threatened, probably with more than just her education."

Harry remembered something Hermione had told him once. _I'd rather be dead that not have an education, Harry. It would be like I was only half-living anyway. And with this education—they're teaching us how to use the magic that's inside of us. Without this, there would be an emptiness inside of me that would consume me. I would rather die than be faced with that._

Harry sighed and rest his head on Draco's shoulder. "I wish she were here now," he said softly. "If she was here, she could tell me what was going on."

"Someday you'll know," Draco promised. He sighed. "Someday we'll all know…."

The next day Ron began acting strangely. He kept looking at Harry with eyes that betrayed what he was feeling: fear. Harry couldn't understand it. What had changed in twenty-four hours? What had caused his best friend to regard him with a fear that appeared barely under control?

Harry decided to confront Ron that night, but Ron never returned to the dormitory.

****

"Draco, I've got to tell you something," Ron said, walking quickly up to Draco in the library after dinner.

"What?" Draco asked, confused.

"It's about Harry," Ron informed the blonde.

"What?" Draco asked, suddenly fearful. He forced himself under control, remembering that Ron didn't know Harry and Draco were dating. "Is he okay?" he asked.

"I don't know," Ron said softly. "I talked to Dumbledore today," he continued, "and he said that Harry was…he said that Harry was going through…changes. He said that he couldn't keep Harry under control and he was afraid that Harry was going to turn."

"Turn?" Draco asked.

"To You Know Who."

Draco shook his head violently. "There's no way Harry would do that," he said. "There's no way in hell Harry would turn to Voldemort."

"But it makes sense," Ron said. "Harry doesn't listen to a thing Dumbledore says anymore. He doesn't help out in the war, he doesn't—"

"He doesn't help out in the war because Dumbledore won't let him," Draco whispered harshly. "Dumbledore insists that Harry's too young, that we're all too young! He says that after school, we can help—become members of the Order even," Draco reminded Ron. "Don't you get it?" he asked. "Harry's not going to turn, Ron, that's Dumbledore trying to manipulate you because he can't get to Harry anymore."

"Watch him," Ron said seriously. "Watch him when he loses control of his anger, when he gets so worked up about something that he's not thinking clearly. Watch him, you'll see the signs."

"I don't believe you. Harry wouldn't do that."

****

"Harry, I've got to tell you something," Draco said, sitting down next to Harry on the grass. Harry looked up from his homework and noticed the concerned look on Draco's face.

"What is it?" he asked.

"I think I know what Hermione overheard."

"What?"

"Dumbledore's is trying to manipulate us into believing that you're going to turn to Voldemort's side. That's why Ron's so freaked out around you lately."

"What?" Harry demanded. "That's ridiculous!" he nearly shouted. "I'm going to go set him straight."

Harry began to stand up but Draco pulled him back down. "Not a good idea," he said. "Ron's hell bent on believing Dumbledore right now, Harry. He says that you're not helping out in the Order because you're switching sides—"

"Mad!" Harry cried. "I'm not switching sides! I haven't helped because Dumbledore hasn't let me!"

"I _know_ that, Harry," Draco said, sounding very much like Hermione. "I'm on your side here. He's also saying that you're uncontrollable, both by yourself and by Dumbledore. He's saying that Dumbledore's afraid that he's lost you completely."

"If he's saying all this—why would he say this?" Harry asked. "It doesn't make any sense. If he were going to use me as a tool, wouldn't he want me closer to him? Wouldn't he want me where he could manipulate me easier?"

"Maybe he's going about this in a different way. Just make sure that I'm normal if I ever get called in to see Dumbledore. There was something about Ron last night…. I don't think he would have believed it unless something had happened to him."

"Wouldn't they have done something to Hermione then as well?"

"Maybe they never got the chance. Or they've taken a page out of the book and are going about this in a different way this year. Maybe Hermione was a trial and when she didn't work, they learned that using magic was the only way to get to the rest of us."

"Maybe," Harry sighed.

Harry slammed his bag down next to Ron at the dinner table that night.

"I'm not switching sides," he said bitterly. "I don't know what Dumbledore told you to make you believe that, but even your evidence is weak. Either you believe me, Ron, or you don't, it's your choice, but remember what you choose when you need a friend one day."

Without even reaching for food, Harry got back up and walked out of the room, sending a glare that promised death to Dumbledore.

He sat alone in his dormitory that night, wondering how safe he really was at Hogwarts. Should he trust the people around for him to go anywhere alone? Should he stay with someone who was safe for him to be around at all times?

Hermione's diary began to glow again and Harry picked it up from the surface of his bed. He opened it up to the third entry and read what was written there for him to see. It answered all of his questions. No, he shouldn't go out alone; no, he shouldn't trust anyone. And no, there was no one safe for him to be around at all times, at least, not anymore. Not now that Dumbledore knows that he and Draco are close friends. Though Harry was sure that the closeness of Harry and Draco's relationship had not yet reached Dumbledore's ears.

"Harry?" It was Seamus.

"Yes?" Harry asked, looking up at the scarlet hanging in front of him. He reached out and moved it so he could see his roommate.

"Malfoy's outside, he says he wants to speak to you."

Harry sighed, wondering if Draco had been captured and modified, but went to him nonetheless.

"Yes?" he asked when he reached the blond.

_"__Harry, you mind coming with me for a minute?__"_ Draco asked.

"Where to?" Harry asked, becoming more and more worried by the second.

_"__The Astronomy Tower__,"_ he answered. _"__The sky's really clear tonight and you can see all the stars. Come on__,"_ he said holding out his hand.

Harry bit his lip. This didn't seem like Draco at all. Harry looked at Draco's eyes and what he saw confirmed his worst fears. They had gotten to him.

"Draco, wake up," Harry whispered, near tears. "Wake up, please!"

_"__I am awake, Harry__,"_ he said simply. His voice was so odd—almost too happy. _"__Come on, Harry, it's an amazing night outside! Just come see__!"_

"Do we have to go to the tower?" Harry asked. "Can't we just go outside by the lake and see the sky?"

_"__You don't see it the same way as you do in the tower__,"_ Draco said. _"__Up there the stars are so close that you can practically pluck them from the sky, and the moon is so huge that you can almost touch it! Come on, Harry, please? Why are you stalling like this__?"_

Harry sighed. "You don't see it do you?" he asked, helplessly.

_"__Come on__,"_ Draco said, _holding_ his hand further out to Harry. This time Harry took it, hoping that he could break the spell over Draco before it was too late.

2-20-1997

Dear Diary,

_Death. That's what they're planning for Harry. Death. I heard it with my own ears this afternoon as I passed Professor Abram's office. She and Dumbledore were talking to someone I can't name and I heard them say that they were going to find a way to kill off Harry before it was too late. Before his power grew so strong that they couldn't control him anymore. They said that they'd found a way to take the power of the Boy Who Lived from him and use it to kill Voldemort, but the only way to do it was to kill Harry first! Merlin, it's so horrible! I'm still shaking with the fear of it! How can they expect me to keep this from Harry? How can I not tell him?_

_And they want Ron and I to help them end Harry's life! I heard that today as well. They're saying that since I've been so cooperative with them about keeping what I know from Harry they can count on my help._

_But they've got to perfect the spell before they can do it. They've got to perfect it so they don't lose the power of the Boy Who Lived and lose all hope of wining the war._

_How can Dumbledore agree to such madness? How can he even believe that I would go through with helping this? How can any of them think that it'll work?_

_Dear Merlin, Harry, don't you ever trust that man again._


	5. Chapter 5

**Hermione stared at Dumbledore in shock.**

"**You want us to help you **_**kill**_** him?" she demanded. "NO!" she yelled. "I won't do it! I'll **_**die**_** before I help you do it!"**

"**Miss Granger, you don't understand," Professor Abram said softly. "If we don't stop Harry now, he'll become out of control. He'll be the next Voldemort. What we're planning on doing is going to stop that from happening. There **_**is**_** one other who can do the job Harry has been destined to do, **_**and**_** he's a lot more well-behaved than Harry is."**

"**I don't want to hear one thing you have to say!" Hermione screamed at her DADA professor. "You're the one who came up with this, aren't you?" she demanded. "Professor Dumbledore, you have to see what you're asking!" she cried. "You have to see that by doing this you're taking the life of the best thing to happen to this school since his father's time!"**

"**Hermione, you must understand that I would not ask this unless I knew it was the best thing for all. We cannot risk the rising of another Dark Lord, and if I can stop that ahead of time, I will."**

"**Who's to say that this other person you give the power to won't do exactly as you expect Harry to?" she demanded. "Who's to say that whoever is next in line won't turn out the same?"**

"**I highly doubt Neville Longbottom is capable of the same acts of violence Harry has been known for."**

"**And **_**I**_** highly doubt Neville is capable of facing Voldemort!" Hermione yelled.**

Harry's heart pounded in his ears as he and Draco entered the top-most chamber of the Astronomy Tower and walked over to the door that lead outside.

"_You're going to love it, Harry,"_ Draco promised. He held his hand out to Harry as he opened the door.

Harry took it and looked at the stairs that lead to the observation level and wondered what it would take for Draco to snap out of whatever spell he was under.

"_Look,"_ Draco breathed, his head as far back is it could go. He pointed up at a constellation. _"Draco,"_ he whispered. _"It's what I'm named after…."_

Harry looked up, but not nearly as far as Draco had. He didn't want to put himself off balance or vulnerable to attack.

"Really?" he asked.

Draco nodded and then moved to the edge of the walkway. _"Wow,"_ he breathed, looking right over. _"Harry, you've got to see this, it's amazing! You can't even see the ground!"_

Harry felt himself tremble slightly in fear and refused to walk over to the ledge. Draco looked back at Harry with a curious expression on his face. _"Well?"_ he asked. _"Don't you want to see this?"_

Harry shook his head. "Draco, don't," he whispered. "Please, for the love of Merlin, wake up…."

Harry felt a sob rise in his throat.

Draco quickly walked up to him and held his arm as he guided Harry to the ledge. _"Look down,"_ he said softly, a possessed feel coming off him in waves. His eyes glinted with a maniacal light. Harry felt himself shake in fear.

Draco forced Harry to look over the ledge.

"_Draco, please,"_ Harry nearly yelled, crying, terrified, unsure if he would survive the night.

"_Harry, can you see the bottom?"_

"No," Harry said, feeling the sob force its way out.

"_You're not looking hard enough," _Draco said, pushing Harry out over the edge.

Harry felt his feet give and he flipped over the edge. He scrambled for a hold on the wall and his fingers caught just before he plummeted to the un-seeable ground below.

"_Can you see it now, Harry?" _Draco asked_._

"Draco, help me!" Harry begged.

"_Can you see the ground?"_

"Draco, _PLEASE!"_

"_Can you see it, Harry?"_

"DRACO!" Harry screamed.

Something flashed in Draco's eyes. Harry's fingers began to slip.

"Draco, I love you!"

"Harry!" Draco bellowed. He reached over the edge and caught Harry's free hand just before the one holding on to the ledge slipped away. Draco worked like mad to get Harry back to safety and held him close as they both cried with relief that Harry was safe.

"I thought I'd lost you," Harry whispered.

"You said you love me," Draco said, holding Harry tighter still.

"I do," Harry said through his tears.

Draco let out a sob. "No one's ever said that to me before," he cried.

"I thought I was going to die," Harry whispered. "I couldn't die without telling you."

"I love you," Draco said, desperately clinging to Harry as though he'd die if they ever let go of each other.

"We failed," Donna said to Dumbledore. "Something happened, I lost the connection."

"We'll just have to try again," the old headmaster said wearily. "This truly is proving to be harder than I imagined."

"Do you think Harry knows something's going on?"

"Not likely," Dumbledore said, confident in his words. "Even if Draco does say that he was bewitched, Harry will probably assume it was a Death Eater who had bewitched him."

"I hope you're right," the Defense professor said softly. "Otherwise we may need to find yet another way of going about this."

"We do _not_ need Hermione. In fact, I'm beginning to wonder if her decision isn't exactly what was needed to help us."

"What happened to you?" Harry asked once they were in the safety of the Gryffindor tower. The common room was deserted, so Harry and Draco took a seat next to the fire.

"I don't know, it's all a blur. I remember that Snape told me that Dumbledore needed to speak to me and that he thought you might have been in trouble. Since you weren't at dinner, I…I jumped to conclusions I guess. Next thing I knew, you were dangling from the edge of the astronomy tower and I did the first thing I could do which was grab you before you fell to your doom."

Harry sighed and rest against Draco's shoulder. "I'm glad you snapped out of it when you did," he sighed.

"Did you know?" Draco asked.

Harry nodded. "I knew."

"Then why the hell did you follow me?" Draco demanded, standing. "If you knew I was under a spell, why the hell did you follow me? You had to have known that something was going to happen!"

Harry nodded. "But I had to snap you out of it, and the only way I could have done that was to go with you."

"Must you _always_ put yourself in danger to save others?" Draco sighed as he sat back down, wrapping his arm around Harry as Harry nestled into Draco once more.

"I put myself in danger to save those I love," Harry said softly. "It's a natural instinct for me, I guess. If I had just walked away and left you alone, you would have kept trying and I couldn't risk putting anyone else in danger. I went to save you, and hopefully not die in the process."

"Then you did what you set out to do," Draco said, staring into the fire.

Eventually, they fell asleep in each other's arms.

"Whoa, did you know?"

"Uh-uh. Did you?"

"I knew they were friends, but…. Are they _gay_, do you think?"

"No, Harry dated Cho Chang and Malfoy dated Pansy Parkinson. You know that, Parvarti."

"Well, yeah, Lav, but that was like…two and three years ago."

"Alright, alright, break it up, people, there are things that need to be done! Such as breakfast and morning classes! Leave them alone!"

Harry's brow furrowed in confusion. He felt someone stir beside him and opened his eyes to see the entire common room full of people staring at him and Draco.

His mouth formed a comical 'O' as he realized what was going on. He shook Draco awake.

"What?" Draco mumbled.

"Err…you need to wake up, love," he said. "We've got an audience."

By lunch everyone had heard that Harry had called Draco "love" and had come to the conclusion that they were dating. This had yet to be confirmed by the two, but when the news reached Professor Abram she knew exactly why her spell had broken over Draco. She hadn't taken into account that there may have been an emotional connection between the two of them and thus her spell was not strong enough to keep Draco under her control.

They couldn't use Draco again.

Harry knew that Dumbledore was the cause of Draco's behavior the night before, and because of that, he lost whatever trust he'd had left for the man. He thought it would be obvious that he knew, but every time he looked up at Dumbledore, the man smiled at him, eyes twinkling, as though nothing were wrong. Harry was beginning to wonder how much Dumbledore really knew and if he suspected that Harry knew at all.

It seemed odd to Harry that they would have gone for Draco. Harry didn't think Dumbledore knew how close they were. He had been, in fact, suspecting that they would continue to use Ron for whatever purpose they had intended Draco for. Harry strongly suspected that they wanted him dead, and a fall from the Astronomy Tower would look like suicide to anyone who didn't know better.

If only he could convince Ron….

Ron, however, would have nothing to do with Harry, not after what he'd seen this morning. Harry would be forever grateful to Ron for breaking up the crowd, but the look in Ron's eyes when Harry saw his face was unbearable. There was a look of pure hatred in Ron's eyes and it made Harry wonder if they had already gotten him under their spell.

"Harry?"

Harry snapped out of his thoughts and looked up at Draco as he sat down on the grass.

"Hmm?" Harry asked.

"What are you thinking?"

"I'm thinking that Dumbledore's trying to have me killed and that his next pawn is Ron."

"You're probably right," Draco agreed, looking out over the still surface of the lake. There was eerie calm about the evening that had Draco on edge. He couldn't explain it, but he jumped at every small thing.

"What is it?" Harry asked.

"I don't know," Draco muttered.

Harry yawned.

"Go to bed, Harry," Draco said. "You didn't sleep much last night."

Harry nodded and stood. "I'll see you in the morning then?" he asked.

Draco nodded. "Bright and early," he said softly, giving Harry a kiss. "Now go to bed."

"Love you," Harry said as he began to walk away.

"Love you too," Draco answered.

Draco watched Harry go.

"How sweet," said a voice behind him. "But since when do Malfoys know the meaning of the word love?"

Draco felt something hit him in the back of the head. He was unconscious before he hit the ground.

When he woke next, he was staring at himself. It wasn't _him,_ but it certainly _looked_ like him.

"What?" he mumbled. He tried to rub his eyes, but found that his arms were chained.

"Awake are we?" the imposter asked.

"Who are you?"

"Draco Malfoy," the imposter answered simply. "Or at least I am now. Listen, thanks for helping us out, you have no idea what you've done for our cause. Getting so close to Harry…." The imposter began to laugh insanely. "Oh, boy, this is _perfect! _I couldn't have planned it better myself. Oh, wait, I _did_ plan it. Well, not you and Harry, but what I'm going to do to you. Do you have any idea what I'm going to do?"

Draco shook his head, no longer groggy. In fact, he felt more awake than he had in a _very_ long time.

"I'm going to break you up," the imposter said. "I'm going to make Harry feel so low that he'll kill himself. It'll be perfect."

"Harry'll see through it," Draco said, finding it hard to breath. "He's on his guard already, he'll see through what you're doing and he won't fall for it."

"Oh, but he already has!" the imposter cried. "Don't you see? We used you first just in case, but now that we know what you and Harry are…. He's not guarded around you any more. He thinks that since we've used you once, we won't use you again!"

Draco shook his head. "It won't work."

_3.15.97_

_Dear Diary,_

_I now know for sure what they plan to do with Harry. They want to __kill__ him. They want Ron and I to help them kill Harry. I can't believe it! There's something else going on here, I know it!_

_Dumbledore says that he thinks Harry is going to become the next Voldemort or something worse. He says that Harry's too uncontrollable, that he can't be trusted, that he can't be stopped…. He says that they've figured out a way to transfer the powers of the Boy Who Lived into someone else. That someone else is Neville Longbottom._

_Personally I think it's a horrible choice and I don't know how they even came up with it. Neville is afraid of his own shadow for crying out loud! There's no way he can face Voldemort and defeat him, he'd freak out and lose before he even got the chance!_

_Why is Dumbledore even considering this? Has Abram done something to him? Has she got him under her control? What is gong on? This is NOT normal! This is NOT Dumbledore!_

_When she and Dumbledore were talking to me today, it was like they weren't even the people they are in public. Abram was…bound, set, and determined to make sure that Harry saw death before he became of age, and Dumbledore backed her up! I've never seen Dumbledore agree to a more insane plan. I've never seen either one of them…. God, please help Harry…. Please make sure he lives to see Voldemort destroyed, if only because he deserves it more than anyone else does._

_Hermione_


	6. Chapter 6

"**He's too dangerous."**

**The voices floated to Hermione as she walked passed Professor Abram's office. She stopped, noticing the door was partially open, and listened.**

"**He must be stopped."**

"**Donna, do you really believe that Harry will become the next Voldemort?"**

"**Albus, I believe he will become something far worse than Voldemort. I believe that if we do not find a way of controlling Harry before the time comes, he will be lost to us forever. You saw how he reacted when you talked to him after Sirius' death—he nearly destroyed your office! Can you honestly allow power like that out of your control?"**

"**No, no, you're right…. How do you propose we stop him?"**

"**Kill him," Abram's voice said simply. "We kill him and we won't have to worry about him any longer."**

**Hermione gasped and brought a shaking hand to her mouth. Kill Harry? **_**Kill**_** him? How could they? How? Why? When?**

"**We'll need to find a way of keeping the power of the Boy Who Lived available to us."**

"**I'm already working on that, Headmaster," Abram said.**

"**We'll need the help of Ron and Hermione. I doubt Harry would trust anyone else."**

"**Yes, Granger's been very cooperative with us so far, she should be trustworthy."**

"**I'll have to talk with her; Ron as well, if we are to be successful in our plans. How long will you need to prefect the spell?"**

"**I don't know."**

When Harry entered the Great Hall the next morning, Draco was nowhere to be found. Confused and slightly hurt, Harry left breakfast and went to their spot by the lake, fully intent on skipping his classes that day.

When he arrived, he saw Draco sitting under the tree.

"Why weren't you at breakfast?" Harry asked as he sat down. "Are you feeling alright?"

Draco nodded. "Sorry," he said, taking a drink from his flask. "Come with me."

A feeling of dread overcame Harry. _Not again,_ he thought desperately.

"No," he said.

"What?" Draco asked, confused. "Why not?"

"I'm not falling for it," Harry said, looking directly into Draco's eyes. He noticed that they didn't have the same crystal-clear quality they usually held, but they weren't dull and empty either, as they had been the night before.

Draco was obviously not under a spell this time.

"I'm not under a curse this time, you know," he said standing up. He walked over to the lake and picked up a rock. "You _can _trust me. I thought we talked about this last night." He moved to throw the rock into the lake, but at the last moment, he turned and threw the rock at Harry instead.

Draco watched in horror as the imposter dragged Harry's body into the room he was chained in.

"Harry?" he whispered, the fear striking him close to his heart.

The imposter waived a wand at Harry and suddenly Harry was chained to the wall next to Draco.

"What did you do to him?" Draco demanded, looking at his spitting image.

The imposter shrugged. "I hit him in the head with a rock."

Draco turned quickly to Harry and saw blood dripping down his face.

"DAMN YOU!" Draco bellowed. He struggled against his chains uselessly. They were so tight he could barely move his arm, let alone hope to struggle himself free of their bonds. _Harry,_ he thought, nearly crying at the sight of the man he loved. Harry's head was slumped forward, his arms were held out, as Draco's were, forming a cross with his body. They were a foot or so off of the ground and there was a platform under their feet, but it wasn't much. Definitely not room to try and escape with. In fact, Draco was sure that if he weren't chained, he wouldn't even be able to stand on the platform.

Harry began to wake up, either from Draco's yelling or something else. He groaned and lifted his head. He tried to move his hand, but when he found it chained, he was instantly awake.

Looking frantically around, Harry saw Draco standing by a cauldron. There were shelves with herbs and potions lining the wall opposite the door and a high window in front of him. If he were still at Hogwarts, he knew he was in the dungeons.

He heard a chain move to his left and turned. He saw Draco chained to the wall next to him, struggling against his bonds. Harry turned back to the cauldron and saw Draco adding ingredients. "What?" he whispered.

He turned to the chained Draco. "Draco?" he asked.

"Harry," Draco said, tears in his eyes.

Harry looked back at the other Draco. "Who's that?" he asked softly.

"Call me Abram," the imposter said. "Professor if you prefer, but Abram nonetheless."

"Why are you doing this?" Harry asked, fighting like mad to keep his wits about him.

Abram shrugged. "You're too much of a threat, Potter," she said.

"A threat to what?" Harry asked.

"The cause," Abram answered simply. "Now sleep," she said, waiving her wand in their direction. Harry and Draco went limp with sleep.

When Harry next woke, it was to find himself falling suddenly. His breath was knocked out of his lungs as he hit the floor, un-braced. Someone, he assumed it was Abram, grabbed his hands and began to drag him across the room. He moved restlessly in his half-awake state, but was quickly waking up as he realized that this was his one chance to escape before he was killed.

Harry grabbed the wrists of the hands that were pulling him and pulled, hoping to knock the person dragging him off balance. It worked, and the form dragging Harry toppled over him. Harry sprang up and, distractedly noticing that it was indeed Professor Abram, grabbed his wand from the table he stood up next to and pointed it at Abram.

She scrambled to her feet and pulled out her own wand as Harry retrieved his.

"A duel, is it?" she asked, beginning to circle Harry. "Very well, Potter, I accept. You defeat me, and you can go. But know this. In order to defeat me, you'll have to kill me because if you don't I'll just keep coming after you."

"I'll give you to the Ministry," Harry said simply. "I won't kill you."

Abram shrugged. "What's the ministry going to do to an Auror who is accused of killing a seventeen year old boy when that boy has no proof or witnesses?"

Harry's eyes flashed to Draco and saw that he was still unconscious.

Abram used that moment to attack using the Hurling Hex. Harry flew back and into one of the shelves. Potion bottles shattered and fell all around him.

Harry cast his next curse before he was back on his feet. _"Locomotor Mortis!"_ he shouted. Abram's legs snapped together and she fought to keep her balance. She failed and fell, but not without sending another curse Harry's way.

"_IMOBULOUS!" _she shouted. Harry froze, mid-movement.

Harry struggled, but eventually worked himself free of the curse using a trick he read in a book once.

"_PETRIFICUS TOTALOUS!"_ he shouted. Abram stopped moving as her arms snapped to her sides. Harry rushed to Draco and unlocked the chains holding him to the wall and gently helped him to the ground. _"Enervate," _he said softly.

Draco stirred and his eyes fluttered open.

"Harry?" he asked.

Harry nodded. "It's me," he said softly. Draco sat up and looked around, seeing the mess left from the duel.

"What happened?" he asked.

"I had a duel with Abram," Harry confessed. "She's petrified right now. We should get out of here before the spell wears off."

"Get her wand," Draco ordered, standing up. He found his wand on the table near where Harry's had been as Harry pried the wand from Abram's fingers. Her eyes narrowed.

"Sorry," he said, "but I can't have you getting free and coming after us.

Struck by a sudden idea, Harry pointed his wand at the professor once more and preformed the stunning spell.

A jet of red light erupted from his wand and hit the professor in the chest. Another jet erupted from Abram's wand and hit the table, shattering one of the legs. Harry realized he should have put the other wand down before he attempted the spell.

The table crashed down, causing ingredients and the cauldron to go everywhere. The potion in the cauldron washed over Abram and sizzled.

"Come on," Draco said, looking fearfully at the professor. "Before someone comes by."

"She got you last night?" Harry asked as Draco revealed the events of his capture.

Draco nodded. "You hadn't even gone inside yet," he said softly. "She came up behind me, I hadn't even turned around, and she hit me in the back of the head with something. I didn't know who she was until she told us."

"Do you think we could go to the Ministry about all this?"

Draco shook his head. "No. A: they're all on Dumbledore's side now, and if he wants you dead, there's noting we can do about it, and B: Abram _is_ an Auror. If she gives them a reason for wanting us dead, they'll fall for it—especially if that reason is that you're bound to become the next Dark Sorcerer. No one wants a repeat of Voldemort running around on the loose, and the _Daily Prophet_ did say that they thought the reason Voldemort went to kill you in the first place was because you would be a bigger bad than he."

Harry sighed and nodded. "I guess you're right," he said. "Merlin, I wish Hermione were here. She'd know what to do."

"Maybe there's something in her diary."

"Maybe," Harry said thoughtfully. "It's up in the dormitory, want to come with me?"

"It was in the dorm this whole time?" Draco asked. "Did you have any idea this would happen?"

Harry shook his head. "No, but I didn't really feel like going to classes, not after almost falling to my death."

"I'm so sorry," Draco said softly. "I can't believe I almost killed you."

Harry stopped walking suddenly. "You did _not_ almost kill me, Draco," he said, placing a finger on Draco's mouth to stop any protest. "Abram almost killed me. Twice now. She was the one controlling you last night, so I don't ever want to hear you say that you almost killed me. Got it?"

Draco nodded before they kissed.

"Have either of you seen Ron?"

Harry turned around to see Ginny behind him.

"Ron's not exactly talking to me right now, Ginny," he said.

She sighed. "I know, but I haven't seen him since breakfast and I'm worried."

"Has he been to any of his classes?" Harry asked.

"Haven't you?" Ginny asked in response.

"Err, not really, no," Harry answered. "We've been…sort of tied up all day."

"Oh…" Ginny said, her face falling. "Well, if you see him, tell him I'm looking for him, will you?" she asked.

"Are you alright?" Harry asked, noticing how worried she was.

"Dad's been attacked again," Ginny said. "Dumbledore won't let me go see him or mum and I'm really freaked out right now. I don't know if Ron knows, or _what_ Ron knows, but I know Mum's got to be going out of her mind at the moment."

Harry and Draco gave each other fearful glances.

"Ginny, I'm sure your dad is going to be fine," Harry said, giving her a hug.

"It's not dad I'm worried about," Ginny confessed. "It's mum."

"Go write her," Harry suggested. "You can use Hedwig if you want, but I'm sure if you write her she'll feel better."

Ginny nodded. "Thanks, Harry," she said softly as she began to walk away.

"Do you think?" Draco asked softly as they began to walk very quickly in the opposite direction.

"I know," Harry said with a finality that proved that he knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that Mr. Weasley was not harmed due to an accident or Death Eater attack. "Let's get to that journal."

Harry went straight to the one place he had found that was perfect for hiding everything—his invisibility cloak, and unwrapped the book he had hidden in its folds.

He opened the diary to see that a fourth entry had been revealed to him, some twenty pages or so after the third one he'd read. He sighed when he finished reading. "It's official," he said as he handed the book over to Draco. "They really do want me dead."

"We're one step behind with this, Harry," Draco said. "Everything you find out you find _after_ you figure it out. We need a way to get the secrets of this diary unlocked a bit faster. Maybe then you'll have a fighting chance."

The dormitory door opened and Draco shoved the book into the cloak and then shoved the cloak into Harry's trunk. They turned to the doorway to see Ron standing there, very red, and looking ready to kill.

"Ginny's looking for you, Ron," Harry said, pretending nothing was wrong with his best friend. His hand clenched around his wand.

"My father is _DEAD_, Potter, and it's all _your fault!_" Ron yelled.

"Ron what—"

Ron charged for Harry and tackled him to the ground. Ron punched Harry repeatedly and Harry refused to fight back.

"I didn't do anything!" Harry kept shouting. "It's not my fault!"

"SHUT UP!" Ron roared, punching Harry. Eventually his hands closed around Harry's throat and began to choke the life from him. That was when Draco finally sprang into action.

He shoved Ron off of Harry and kicked him in the stomach. "That's for nearly killing him!" he shouted. He kicked Ron again. "That's for hitting him in the first place!" He kicked him again. "That's for accusing him of shit he didn't do!" Draco kicked Ron one final time. "And _that's_ for my own anger!"

"Draco, come on," Harry said, reaching into his trunk for the invisibility cloak and shoving it into his school bag. The two ran from the tower and down to the Slytherin common room. Draco lead the way to his room, no questions asked from anyone, and locked the door behind him.

They both stood in the middle of the room, trying desperately to catch their breath.

"You were right," Draco said between gasps of air. "Ron was their next pawn."

Harry nodded. "It was in the diary," he said. "Hermione said that I shouldn't trust either of them if they'd gone to a meeting with Dumbledore or if they asked me to go somewhere by myself."

"And now you just can't trust Ron period."

Draco noticed that Harry's lip was bleeding and that he had a slight bloody nose. "Come here," he said, walking to the bathroom. "Let's get you cleaned up."

Harry sat on the counter as Draco washed the blood from his face. "You never hit him back," Draco said as he rinsed out the washcloth he was using. "Not once. And you didn't even try to block him. Why?"

Harry mutely shook his head. "I didn't see the point in hitting someone who didn't really know what he was doing," he said softly. "And besides, even if he is under a spell of some sort, he is still my best friend."

"He was going to kill you with his bear hands, Harry," Draco said.

"You were going to let me fall from the top of the Astronomy Tower," Harry countered. "And yet I'm still—ouch!" he hissed as Draco placed the rag on his lip. "Merlin, what is that?"

"Isopropyl alcohol," Draco muttered, blushing slightly.

"You use _Muggle_ antibiotics?" Harry asked, amazed.

"I've always used it," Draco confessed. "When your father beats you, you can't exactly go to the healer, so you find ways around it. Muggle remedies work wonders."

"You never cease to amaze me," Harry said softly, his hand cupping Draco's face. He brought his mouth to Draco's and they kissed, abandoning the attempt to clean up Harry's face.

The next morning would tell the tale of the night before by the discarded clothes showing the path Draco and Harry took from the bathroom to the bed where it would see Harry and Draco wrapped up in each other.

Draco sighed as he woke, remembering the events of the previous night. Everything had been…perfect. He had explored every inch of Harry and now knew him by heart. He memorized every scar, every nook and cranny, every freckle…. He knew exactly what to do to make Harry melt, to make him cry, to make him scream…. And Harry knew the same about Draco.

Draco sighed again and held Harry closer to him. Somehow, he knew they would make it out of this alive. Even if that meant that they would leave the school.

Draco sat up quickly. "That's it," he breathed. They would have to leave the school to save Harry's life.

"Harry," he said urgently, shaking Harry slightly to wake him up.

"Mmm, what?" Harry mumbled, rolling over.

"I know what we need to do to save your life," Draco said.

Harry's eyes fluttered open and a look crossed his face as it does when one wakes up in a strange room and has yet to remember what happened the night before.

"What?" he asked, his eyes settling back on Draco once they scanned the room.

"We have to leave," Draco answered.

Harry sat up. "Are you sure?" he asked.

Draco nodded. "Think about it," he said. "Out there you have Voldemort to worry about, but Voldemort doesn't reside in the same walls that you do. In here we've got Ron, Abram, Dumbledore and who knows how many others. In here you don't know who to trust."

_3.20.97_

_Dear Diary, _

_Today I was gifted with one of the biggest shocks of my life and it has nothing to do with the threat of Harry's! In fact, it was some of the best news I've had in a LONG time!_

_As it turns out, Harry and Draco Malfoy have decided to put aside their differences! Harry says that they're not quite friends, but their not rivals or enemies anymore either! I'm so happy! For once there is good news!_

_But, as always, with the sweets come the sours._

_I don't know what's going on with Abram and Dumbledore, but something has to be hapening. I don't know how to explain it, but it doesn't feel right. I feel like they're planning something. Something big. I don't know what it is yet, but I know I'll find out soon enough._


	7. Chapter 7

**"Harry, can I talk to you?" Hermione asked, sitting across from Harry at the table he was using to complete his homework on.**

"**Sure," Harry muttered, finishing a sentence before looking up at his best friend.**

**"Harry, there's something I need to tell you," Hermione began. She tried to get it out—she just had to tell him about everything she knew about Abram and Dumbledore, but suddenly the words wouldn't come.**

"**Hermione, is everything alright?" Harry asked.**

"**It's fine," Hermione lied. "Nevermind, forget I said anything."**

**Harry shrugged and went back to his homework. Hermione nearly cried with the realization that no matter what, she would **_**not**_** be able to tell Harry what he needed to know. There had to be something she could do to tell him…. They couldn't control everything she did, could they?**

Both Harry and Draco skipped their classes that day as well. Draco packed up his few belongings and hid with Harry under the invisibility cloak to get to the Gryffindor tower to do the same with Harry's things.

Harry quickly shoved what he owned into his trunk and cast a weightless charm on it before he shrunk it so he could carry it in his pocket. Together, they left the school behind. Harry looked longingly back on the castle once as they walked through the gate and took off the cloak before turning away from it forever.

Hermione had said not to trust anyone. Harry knew she was right.

"Where will we go?" Harry asked.

"The Three Broomsticks I guess," Draco said as they began the trek to Hogsmeade. "Do we have enough to rent a room for a while?"

Harry nearly laughed but stopped himself from doing so. "Yes," he said instead. "We have enough."

*

"You're dropping out?" Madam Rosmerta asked after Harry and Draco told her their reasons for wanting a room.

"It's not exactly by choice," Harry muttered. "Rather a lack of options."

Madam Rosmerta eyed the two suspiciously. "One bed or two?" she asked, accepting them into her inn.

"One," Draco answered. Madam Rosmerta's eyebrows rose in slight surprise.

"You're not like your fathers with that one," she muttered pulling out a ledger. "Let's see," she said thoughtfully as she looked through the pages. "Ahh, yes," she said, putting her finger down. She reached under the counter and pulled up a key. "Room 29," she said. "It's third floor, all the way to the back. Last on the left."

"Thank you," Harry said, taking the key and handing over the gold needed for the room for a week.

The two traveled to the top floor of the building and walked to the end of the hall.

"Thirty rooms, huh?" Draco asked as Harry unlocked theirs.

"Guess so," Harry said, pushing open the door.

"The manor has fifty," Draco said closing the door.

"Sorry we can't go to the manor," Harry said slightly angry.

"Sorry," Draco said quickly. "I didn't mean to sound…."

Harry shook his head. "Forget about it," he ordered. "It's better than what I had at the Dursleys at any rate."

"What did you have there?"

"A cupboard under the stairs until I turned eleven. Then I got my cousin's second bedroom. Not much bigger than the closet, and a lot more cluttered."

"You slept under the _stairs?_" Draco asked in shock.

Harry nodded. "You weren't the only one who was abused, Draco," Harry said softly, pulling his luggage from his pocket. He reversed the magic on it and proceeded to pull his clothes from the trunk.

"What are you doing?" Draco asked.

"Well, it looks like we'll be here for a while, so I'm putting my clothes in the drawers."

"Oh. Right."

"Not everything is done by servants, Draco," Harry said softly. "Especially here. This isn't the Manor, as you said earlier. And I really don't know why you're suddenly comparing everything to it."

Draco shook his head. "Neither do I," he confessed.

No one seemed to notice that Harry and Draco had suddenly disappeared. In fact, the only sign that anyone knew they were gone came a week later when an owl arrived telling them that if they were leaving the school, they would need to send an owl stating as such and that they would be given a certificate that said that they had completed their magical training, but had not taken the N.E.W.T.s. It was signed Donna Abram.

"They know we're gone," Draco said softly.

"Of course," said a voice from the doorway.

Harry and Draco turned to see Albus Dumbledore standing just outside the room.

"What are you doing here?" Harry demanded angrily, the need to attack Dumbledore nearly overpowering.

"Harry, I want you to promise me that you will _not_ act rashly."

"What are you talking about?" Harry demanded.

"You're under arrest, Harry," Dumbledore said quietly. "For the murder of Donna Abram, destruction of school property, and assault on another student."

Harry's mouth dropped. "They attacked me!" he yelled.

"Your trial is in three weeks," he said almost mechanically. "You will spend that time in Azkaban Prison."

"What?" Draco demanded.

"Draco, no," Harry said quickly. He handed his lover his wand. "I'll go quietly," Harry said as Aurors walked into the room.

"Harry, no! You didn't do anything!" Draco yelled.

The Aurors walked up to Harry and turned him around. They pulled his arms behind his back and Harry saw Draco had tears in his eyes.

"I love you," Harry said softly.

Draco walked up to him and they kissed one last time before the Aurors drug Harry from the room.

Draco ran out of the room in time to see them reach the stairs. "Harry, I love you!" he yelled down the hall before feeling a sob rise in his throat.

*

If the wizarding world had a hell, Azkaban was it. With Dementors patrolling the halls at regular intervals forcing Harry to remember everything that had ever happened in his life, he knew that there was no need for a devil. He understood completely how Azkaban could be so trusted and was so secure. With being forced to visit the graveyard and see his parents die, he could do little more than whimper in a corner most of the time. He wished he were an Animagus so he could escape the horrors as Sirius had in his twelve years in the snowy white prison.

It was three weeks of teetering on the brink of insanity, three weeks of living in hell, three weeks of knowing he was being wrongly accused.

How the hell did Sirius do it for twelve years?

Finally the trial arrived. For Harry and Draco, the day couldn't have come soon enough.

"Mr. Potter, tell us, in your own words, what happened the day in question."

Harry's heart raced and he swallowed the lump in his throat before he told the entire Wizengamot the story of what had happened the day Abram was supposedly killed.

"Let me get this straight," the prosecutor said, walking back and forth in front of Harry. "Donna Abram hit you in the head with a _rock_ while pretending to be your lover, Draco Malfoy?"

The Wizengamot chuckled.

"Yes," Harry said with a nod.

"And when you woke up, you were tied to a wall?"

"Yes," Harry said calmly.

The prosecutor began to laugh. Harry forced himself to remain calm.

"Honorable Wizengamot, Minister, I beg you to put this madman in the care of the Dementors. Clearly he is not well. He is a _threat_. He _killed_ one of his professors and he gives us this story! Put aside what he is, _who_ he is, and you've still got—"

"She was _alive_ when we left!" Harry said loudly.

"She was _dead_ when Headmaster Dumbledore found her!" the prosecutor shouted, his face only inches away from Harry's.

"I DIDN'T KILL HER!" Harry bellowed, his face turning read from the anger of being wrongly accused and insulted.

"Then how did she die?" he asked softly.

"I don't believe she did," Harry said flatly.

"And why is that?"

"Because I received a letter from the school a week later that was signed by her," Harry answered. "And that this was the second attempt on my life within three days."

The prosecutor's eyebrows rose to his hairline. "The second?" he asked.

Harry nodded.

"Indulge us," the prosecutor said with a smirk on his face.

"Two days earlier, I was lured to the top of the Astronomy Tower. Up there, I was pushed over the edge. I managed to grab the ledge just before I fell."

"You were pushed?"

"Yes."

"And you fell?"

"I told you I grabbed the ledge just in time," Harry said, feeling the fury rise in him again.

The prosecutor laughed again. "What a story," he said. "Tell me, is that how you got your first girlfriend?" he asked. "With your adventurous tales that leave you in danger but you somehow make it out?"

"What are you talking about?" Harry asked.

"Did you know Cho Chang was dead?" the prosecutor asked.

The shock hit Harry like a tidal wave. "What?" he breathed.

"So you didn't know?" the prosecutor asked.

"No," Harry said softly.

"Did you know you were the last person to see her alive?"

The next day Draco took the stand.

"Please state your name for the record," the prosecutor said.

"Draco Xavier Malfoy," Draco answered.

"Were you in any way involved in the events leading up to Donna Abram's death?" the prosecutor asked.

"No," Draco said calmly, "I was unconscious."

"So you have no idea if Harry killed the professor or not?"

"She was alive when Harry woke me up."

"What are you saying?"

"Harry didn't kill her," Draco said flatly. "She was under the Body Bind when Harry woke me up, and to make sure she didn't come after us right away, Harry used the stunning spell on her. He missed the first time he cast it, and a table broke, spilling the contents of a cauldron on her. We left then."

"So you didn't even stop to check to see if she was alright?"

"There was no time," Draco said. "I heard footsteps coming down the hall so we ran."

The testimony was lost to Harry as his eyes fell on Dumbledore.

The headmaster had a slightly confused look on his face, as though he didn't understand what was going on. His eyes were in and out of focus, as though he were fighting the effects of something.

"Did Harry Potter kill Donna Abram?" the prosecutor nearly yelled.

"He didn't kill her," Draco said.

"Did you?"

"No."

"Then how did she die?"

"Why don't you tell me?" Draco asked.

"ANSWER THE QUESTION!"

"Look," Draco said shortly. "All I know is that the table broke and the cauldron spilled on the bitch. She was _fine_ when we left!"

The prosecutor sighed. "Fine," he said. "We're through here. I call Albus Dumbledore to the stand."

_5.2.97_

_Dear Diary, _

_You'll never guess who joined the DA today. Draco Malfoy, no surprise, he's been around Harry enough lately; Blaise Zabini, he's Draco's friend so I'm not surprised there either; and Pansy Parkinson. Now that I'm surprised about. I didn't see Pansy as being the type of Slytherin who would have a good side, especially not after seeing her as the most enthusiastic of the Inquisitorial Squad last year._

_Knowing that she was a part of the squad, and what Umbridge turned out to be, I wonder if any of the three newest know of the plan Dumbledore and Abram have devised. After all, it wouldn't surprise me. Not when Abram seems to have as much power as Umbridge had last year, and all of Abram's power seems to come from Dumbledore himself. I would say that it's because of the fact that she's an Order of the Phoenix member, but Snape, McGonagall, and who knows how many other teachers are also a part of it, so I know it's not that. Maybe it's because she's an Auror, but Umbridge was Senior Undersecretary to Fudge when he was Minister, so I don't see why she would have more power that way._

_So I guess it's because she is a part of this plot to kill Harry. After all, she has to be the only one. If she weren't I think I would have heard either about them in the conversations I have overheard, or I would have heard them involved in the conversations I've heard._

_I know it's going to take something drastic to bring up Harry's defense. He can NOT trust Dumbledore, he just can't. In fact, if I thought it would do any good, I'd tell him not to go to school next year, but coming from me, he'd think I was a Death Eater in disguise or something. And I know I can't get anyone else to do it either, they'll ask too many questions and I can't risk getting anyone else involved. It's just too dangerous._

_I hope I can find a way to alert Harry soon, before it's too late. Merlin, give me the strength to do what I must…._

_Hermione_


	8. Chapter 8

"**Miss Granger, will you please see me after class?" Professor Abram asked as she passed Hermione's desk. The bell rang and the other students got up to leave, but Hermione stayed, somehow knowing that this was about the conversation she had overheard at Christmas.**

"**Yes?" Hermione asked, walking up to the professor.**

"**I saw you, Miss Granger, on Christmas. You were eavesdropping on a conversation between the headmaster and myself. I want you to know, Miss Granger, that if you breathe one word of that conversation to the person in question, I will ensure that what you went through as a result of Rita Skeeter calling you a Scarlet Woman will seem like child's play when I am through with you. I can guarantee that you'll be getting much worse than undiluted Bubotuber Puss in your letters."**

"**I don't care what you do to me," Hermione said flatly. "But Harry's got to know what it is he's dealing with. Anyone who threatens his life deserves to be killed, and I will make sure of that."**

"**Is that a threat, Miss Granger?" Abram asked.**

"**Consider it a promise," Hermione answered before she walked out of the classroom.**

"State your name for the record."

"Professor Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore," Dumbledore said. "Would you like my credentials as well?"

"No, we're fine without those. I think we all know what you are."

"Headmaster, do you recall the events leading up to your finding Donna Abram dead in her private laboratory on October twenty-ninth?"

"Donna's dead?" Dumbledore asked, his face ashen.

The prosecutor looked nervous. "Yes, in fact you are the one who alerted us to the fact. You accused Mr. Potter of the murder, saying that you saw him running around a corner as you were walking down to attend a meeting with Donna. Do you remember?"

Dumbledore shook his head, a dazed and confused look on his face. "I don't remember any of that."

"Headmaster, what day is it?"

"I don't know…."

"The date is November twenty-sixth nineteen-ninety-seven. What is the last thing you remember?"

"I was in a meeting with Donna about her appointment," Dumbledore said, clearly dazed. "It was…July, nineteen-ninety-five." He looked up at the prosecutor in shock. "Two years?" he whispered.

A member of the Wizengamot stood. "The prosecution has no case, therefore the charges of murder, destruction of property, and assault against Harry Potter are dropped. This case is dismissed. Headmaster, I suggest you go to St. Mungo's for an examination."

The Aurors holding Harry let him go and he rushed to meet Draco in the center of the room, a few feet away from Dumbledore.

"Are you okay?" Draco asked between kisses. "Merlin, I was so worried about you."

Harry held Draco close and breathed deeply, letting the smell of Draco calm him down. "God, I missed you," he said softly.

"Azkaban—Harry, how are you?"

Harry shook his head. "I don't want to talk about it," he said, his eyes falling on Dumbledore, who sat in the witness chair with a shocked look on his face. Harry reluctantly let Draco go and walked to the man who he once thought invincible.

"Professor Dumbledore?" he asked.

Startled, Dumbledore turned to Harry. "Murder?" he asked. "Assault? I did this?"

"You've done more than just this," Harry said softly. "Don't you remember?"

Dumbledore shook his head. "No," he said simply. "What's happened?"

"First of all, you and Professor Abram wanted me dead for some other purpose I don't yet know. Hermione found out about it and she killed herself just after the holidays began. About a month ago, either you or Professor Abram cast a spell on Draco and it made him go slightly insane, he tried to drop me off of the top of the astronomy tower, then Professor Abram used a Polyjuice Potion to disguise herself as Draco. She had us both tied up in her laboratory for a while. I guess she died down there as well, but that doesn't make any sense."

"Why not?" Dumbledore asked.

"Because a week after Draco and I left Hogwarts, we got a letter saying that we needed to owl the school to say we weren't coming back and it had her signature on it. I thought McGonagall did all that stuff."

Dumbledore nodded. "I thought so as well," he said. "How have I missed so much?" he asked softly, more to himself than to Harry.

Harry shook his head. "You didn't miss it," he said. "You were behind it all."

Dumbledore heaved a heavy sigh. "I am sorry for any pain I may have caused you, Harry," he said softly, placing a hand on Harry's shoulder. "And I mean that for your entire life, not just the time I was unaware of what I was doing."

Harry shrugged. "You only tried to kill me twice," he said offhandedly. "You've got a few more tries before I harbor any hard feelings towards you."

"And Draco Malfoy is involved in this?" Dumbledore asked, looking passed Harry to the blond in question.

Harry nodded. "Draco is my boyfriend," Harry said softly. "You've missed quite a bit."

*

Harry and Draco returned the Three Broomsticks that night.

"Harry, are you _sure_ you're all right?" Draco asked. "You're acting the same as my father after he got out of Azkaban."

Harry shook his head. "Dumbledore doesn't remember a thing," he said softly. "Not one thing."

"Maybe he was under a spell or something. Like I was."

Harry shook his head. "Dumbledore's too powerful to be overcome by a spell, Draco, especially if it's the same as the one Abram used on you. I would have broken that fairly easily as well."

"Maybe he was drugged then."

"Do you think Ron was?"

Draco nodded. "Either drugged or spelled."

Harry sighed heavily and walked over to the window. "Do you think she's really dead?" he asked, looking though his reflection to the heavy snowflakes falling outside.

In the reflection, Harry saw Draco walk up behind him. Draco wrapped his arms around Harry's waist and rest his chin on Harry's shoulder. "I love you," he said softly.

"Love you," Harry replied, leaning into him.

*

The next morning Ron showed up while the two were eating breakfast in the pub. It was the last weekend before the Christmas holidays began and the school was out for Hogsmeade.

"I heard about what happened," he said before he sat down. "Harry, my dad…he's dead."

Harry nodded sadly. "I know," Harry said. "You tried to kill me because of it."

Ron hung his head. "Yeah, I heard about that too. I'm sorry."

Harry shook his head. "No hard feelings," he said. "You weren't exactly yourself."

Ron looked up at Harry and noticed that he had quite a few tiny cuts all over his face.

"Did I do all those?" he asked.

Harry shook his head. "No, most of them I did to myself in Azkaban."

Ron shuddered. "Merlin, Harry, what…" Ron fell silent, not daring to ask the rest of the question. "Would you like to come to the Burrow for Christmas?' he asked. "Mum would probably love to have you."

Harry remembered what Mrs. Weasley's worst fear had been and nodded. "Can Draco come?" he asked.

Ron and Draco exchanged glances. "Yeah," Ron said finally. "Yeah, he can come."

*

Mrs. Weasley was waiting for the four of them as they stepped off the Hogwarts Express the next day. She looked thinner than Harry had ever seen her and she was far too pale to be healthy. Harry was sure her health had taken a dive with Mr. Weasley's death.

She pulled Ginny and Ron into a tight hug when she saw them first.

"I was so shocked when Dumbledore said you couldn't come," she said. She turned to Harry and Draco. "Come here," she said, pulling them both into a hug.

A hug that Harry felt had lost most of its strength.

When Harry saw her face again, he saw that it was soaked with tears.

"We're going to Floo home from Diangon Alley," she said, leading the way out to the Muggle world.

*

Harry chuckled at Draco's amazement when he stepped out of the fireplace. He was trying to look in every direction possible and tipped his head so far back that he nearly fell into the table. Ginny laughed at it.

Draco quickly recovered and went back to being a Malfoy. He stood up straight and kept himself from looking around in awe. Harry chuckled and shook his head.

"What?" Draco asked.

"Nothing," Harry said softly.

Mrs. Weasley was the last person through. When she entered the house, she set to work in the kitchen. "Harry, Draco, you two can take Percy's old bedroom. There's just not enough room for all of you in Ron's."

Harry and Draco exchanged a glance before looking back at Mrs. Weasley, who was watching them.

"Ginny told me," she said softly.

Harry and Draco looked at Ginny. She blushed and looked away. "It's all over school," she said. "Most everyone thinks you two ran away to get married."

Harry and Draco blushed.

"Mum wanted to know why I wasn't dating you, Harry," Ginny continued. "I had to tell her about you and Draco."

Mrs. Weasley was a wreck all through the break. Harry would constantly find himself walking in on her in tears, but she would never talk to anyone about it. She kept saying that she was fine, that she had to be strong, that, no matter what, Harry was not to let anyone know about her tears.

Bill, Charley, Percy, Fred, and George all came home for Christmas. It was very subdued, being that it was the first without Mr. Weasley.

Gifts were exchanged, smiles were shared, but there was no cheer in the house. In fact, the day was so hard on Mrs. Weasley that she began to cry uncontrollably just after everyone had gone to bed. Her sobs woke up her children, who went to see her crying for the first time since they heard of their father's death.

"So she does cry," Harry heard Bill saying as the Weasley children went back to their beds.

Harry looked at Draco. "Now they know she's not superhuman," he said softly.

Draco chuckled. "They've always known," he said. "None of them ever show it, but they know."

"How do you know?" Harry asked, climbing into bed next to Draco.

"I have a family, Harry," he said softly. "My father may be a arse, but my mum's still my best friend."

"I wish I knew what that was like," Harry said softly.

Draco wrapped his arms around Harry. "You will," he said softly. "One day you will."

"When?" Harry asked.

Draco sighed. "I don't know," he said. "But I promise you, it will happen."

*

Harry and Draco stayed behind as Ron and Ginny went back to school.

"You two really need to go back to school," Mrs. Weasley said as the train left the station.

"No," Harry sighed. "We're needed elsewhere."

"Will you stay with me then?" she asked. "At least then I know you're safe."

*

Harry and Draco returned to the Three Broomsticks to check out of their room and get their things. They were walking passed Hogwarts when Dumbledore met them at the gates.

"I wish you would reconsider you decision to refrain from furthering your education," he said softly.

Harry and Draco shook their heads. "No, Headmaster," Harry said softly. "Not after what's happened."

"Donna Abram is no longer a professor at this school," Dumbledore said softly. "There is nothing to fear."

"As long as I don't have a guarantee that she's dead," Harry began, "she'll always be a threat."

Dumbledore nodded. "But you're safer inside the walls of Hogwarts than you are out there. Where are you going to go?"

"We'll figure that out when we get there," Harry said. "As for right now, we're heading back to the Burrow. Mrs. Weasley really needs someone around and Bill and Charley have to leave for their missions, and Percy and the twins all have very important jobs and no longer live at home. We figured we'd stay for a little while."

Dumbledore nodded. "That's a very good idea," he said. "I'm sure Molly will appreciate that very much."

*

Voldemort entered the room and the one Death Eater bowed down low. "I've failed," said a feminine voice.

"Try again," Voldemort hissed.

*

_5.20.97_

_Dear Diary,  
_

_I can't believe Dumbledore! He's gone mental! Today he and Abram actually __ASKED__ me for my help. AND they want me to get Ron to help them too! They're insane! They say that it's best for the war and for Harry if we KILL him! I can't believe they would actually ASK this!_

_And Abram was full of herself. "You've known this was coming," she'd said. Merlin, I could kill her. Maybe I will. She deserves to die for the plans she has for Harry. How anyone can plan the destruction of another is completely beyond me. I'll bet she's a Death Eater spy for Voldemort._

_Maybe she's controlling Dumbledore!_

_Merlin, I sound like Ron._

_Sometimes Ron is right though…._

_Merlin, what if Dumbledore IS under control?_


	9. Chapter 9

**Hermione unwrapped her Christmas gift from her mother. A diary. A book with blank pages. A place for her to write anything and everything she chose. She sighed, causing Ron and Harry to look up at her in concern.**

"**What is it?" Ron asked.**

"**A diary," Hermione answered softly, looking at the book affectionately. "It's from my mum."**

"**You got a book with blank pages," Harry said. "Wow."**

**Hermione chuckled and tucked the diary safely away.**

**Harry stood up. "I've got to go meet Cho," he said. "I'll see you guys for the feast?"**

**Hermione and Ron nodded.**

**Soon after Harry left, Hermione wrote a letter to her parents, thanking them for the diary and decided to mail it. On her way back she heard voices floating down the hall.**

"…**We need to do something, Headmaster," one of the professors was saying. "He is a danger if we don't tighten our control on him. We're going to lose him if we don't. He'll never fight for us."**

**"Are you saying that you think he'll explode again, Donna?" the headmaster's voice asked.**

**"Yes I do," the female voice replied. "And I think it is in our best interest if stop him before he gets that chance. We have to shut him down." Hermione saw them coming and decided to run. She soon heard another voice shouting. This one she recognized as Cho.**

"**Why won't you tell me what's going on?" she demanded. "What's so hard for you to say?"**

**Hermione peeked down the hall and saw Harry say something but she couldn't hear what it was. She saw Cho's shoulder's shake and knew that he had finally told her his biggest secret—the one he hadn't even told Ron and Hermione. Cho went running and nearly knocked into Hermione as she passed.**

**Hermione stared down the hall at Harry in shock. "What was that all about?" she asked.**

**Without a word, Harry gave Hermione a look that explained it all.**

"**You told her you were gay, didn't you?" she asked.**

**Harry nodded, not even wondering how Hermione knew his secret.**

Harry sighed as he walked out of Weasley's Wizard Wheezes. He had been working for the twins for three months and counting. He was great for business—everyone came for a chance to meet the Boy Who Lived, as well as purchase the very popular joke products.

Harry was also working for the Order. He was there when Snape came running in, demanding to know where Dumbledore was, saying he knew where Donna was.

She was a Death Eater, and a very good one. Her mission, apparently, had been to get Harry killed one way or another. According to what Snape had learned, she was behind Dumbledore's loss of two years, Draco nearly dropping Harry off of the top of the Astronomy Tower, and Ron's nearly choking Harry to death. She was the mastermind of the trial as well. In fact, she had been the prosecuting attorney. She had been the one to call in her own death, pretending to be Dumbledore, she had been the one to convince the Aurors that Harry was dangerous and needed to spend the time before his trial in Azkaban, she was the one who questioned them.

She would have gone one step further, but she wasn't allowed near the witnesses during a trial.

For the moment, everything was at peace. There were no major battles being fought, the Ministry was safe in the hands of the new minister, the school was safe with the new Defense professor going through a through screening to ensure the safety of both the other professors and the students. The other professors were checked and cleared before being allowed to go back to work. All of this had been done during the Christmas holidays.

Harry sighed again as he began the trek to the Leaky Cauldron for lunch before going back to work. Life was simple these days. He and Draco had moved out of the Burrow and Harry was planning on asking Draco to marry him soon.

Life was good.

"Hello, Potter."

_Was_ being the operative word.

Harry didn't bother turning around. He knew exactly who was behind him and the one thought crossing through his mind was: I knew it.

"Donna Abram," he said.

"You know, if you would have just cooperated and _died_, we wouldn't be standing here right now, and I wouldn't be about to curse half of Diagon Alley because of you."

"If you curse the alley, that is because of you, not me. I'm not the one holding the wand and I'm not the one thinking about it, so if you do decide to curse the alley, you'll be the one to be blamed for it. I'm not going to have another of your crimes hanging over my head."

"You know, in the beginning this was all just for my mission, but now it's personal. Turn around, Potter," she said. "And see what you did to me."

Harry turned around.

What he saw was a monster. Donna Abram had once been a rather pretty woman with long brown hair and dark brown eyes. She had had an olive complexion at one time, though by the scars on her face any onlooker who had never seen her before would never know what color her skin was. She wore an eye patch over her right eye and had no eyebrow over her left. Her hair was gone, nothing but shiny scars remained on the top of her head, and her remaining eye was no longer the same brown it had been.

"You turned me into this when you left without clearing away that potion," she said. "Do you have any idea how badly that burned? That potion was intended for you and for you alone. It would have killed you and contained your soul, which I was supposed to deliver to the Dark Lord, but no. You had to wake up, didn't you? _You had to fight, didn't you?_ _You had to fuck up my face, didn't you?_" she yelled.

"Leave," Harry said. "Just leave. Now is not the time nor place for this. If you have a desire to fight me, we'll go somewhere else. No one else needs to get hurt. I'm sorry for what happened to you, I really am, but you're the one who brewed the potion in the first place, and since it was designed to kill me, I'm really not sorry about the way it was ultimately used. If you're looking for pity, go stand on a corner and beg for it, you won't find it here. As for your mission, since you're still alive, I'm assuming that you still have it. If that's the case, you'll have to excuse me, but I'll be cutting this chat short. I've got work to do."

"This isn't over, Potter," she said.

"No, but now that you've been exposed for what you really are, we're on even footing," he said as he walked away.

*

"I saw Donna today," Harry said as he walked through the door to the house.

Draco nearly choked on the water he was drinking. "What?" he asked.

"I saw Donna Abram today," Harry said again. "She's alive and well, but she looks like a monster."

"How so?"

"Remember that potion she was working on?" he asked. "The one that spilled on her?"

"Yes."

"Apparently it was intended for one person only—I'll give you two guesses, but you'll only need one as to who it was for—and it was supposed to kill and capture the spirit. When it was spilled on Donna, it burned everything. She's wearing an eye patch so I'm assuming she lost an eye and chose not to go Mad-Eye's route with it. And she's still working for Voldemort."

"How do you know?"

"She's still alive," Harry answered. "And she was still looking for me and talking about her mission. I told you we haven't seen the last of her."

"What about the diary, is there any more of that that you've read?"

"So far I've read eight entries. The last one I read talked about Dumbledore actually asking Hermione to get Ron to help her help them kill me. I think I'm going to let Dumbledore see it—he still doesn't remember anything and the medi-wizards can't find anything wrong with him."

"Speaking of," Draco said, setting down his glass, "I've been doing some thinking about that. We all know Dumbledore's far too strong to be subdued by a normal spell, but very few are immune to potions and, obviously, Abram was good with potions. Maybe she was using a potion on Dumbledore."

"That would explain why they can't find any traces of spells on Dumbledore."

"They couldn't find them on Ron either and Ron has the same memory loss, even if it isn't for the same amount of time."

"But you remember, don't you?"

Draco nodded. "She cast a spell on me, Harry, I remember. And that night, I was seeing what I was doing, but I was powerless to stop it. It was almost as if I were under Impervious, but I've been under that so many times that I can shake it off as good as you can."

Harry nodded slowly. "But wouldn't they have found it?"

"Not if they weren't looking for potions. Potions and spells have different signatures on the body. If you're looking for a spell, you won't find a potion and vice versa. Next time you see Dumbledore, tell him to go back and see if they can find a potion on him."

Harry nodded slowly. "I've got a meeting with him tomorrow," he said. "I'll tell him then."

*

"It's called the Impervious Draught," the medi-witch explained. "It works the same way as the curse, except that it isn't fightable and once the potion is out of your body, you don't remember a thing because nothing was actually committed to memory."

"And it's in both of their systems?" Harry asked.

The medi-witch nodded. "Yes, we found it in both of them."

Harry sighed. "Is there any way to get the memories back?" he asked.

"No, I'm afraid that there isn't. Like I said, nothing was actually committed to memory. If there had been memories, we may have been able to do something regarding memory retrieval. Given time, they will return to their normal selves, Mr. Weasley much sooner than Headmaster Dumbledore for obvious reasons."

"Is there anything I can do to help them?" Harry asked, hoping that there was some possible way to fix this madness. He really needed information only Dumbledore could have—information about Donna.

The medi-witch shook her head. "There's nothing to do but wait," she said softly.

*

Harry was walking home with Draco when it happened. A Death Eater stepped out of the shadows in the alleyway. Harry instantly had his wand out and pointed at the person behind the mask. "Show yourself," he softly ordered.

The Death Eater brought a gloved hand to the mask and pulled it off. "You should know who is going to kill you before you die," she said. Harry's eyes narrowed on the scarred face. Behind him, Draco pulled his wand from his robe.

"I'm not the one who is going to die tonight," Harry said softly. "Draco?" he said softly.

"I'm not leaving," came Draco's reply. "There's not a damn thing you can say that's going to change my mind."

"I wasn't going to ask you to leave," Harry replied. "I was going to tell you I love you."

"That had better not be your goodbye," Draco said.

"It's not."

A silver jet that looked like an arrow sped passed Harry's ear. Harry turned as the arrow hit the brick wall behind him. The battle had just begun.

Silently, Harry sent the Reductor curse Abram's way. She flew into the dumpster a few feet behind her as he and Draco split up in order to make the duel harder on the ex-professor.

Abram slowly got to her feet. Apparently the time in which she had last battled Harry, she had gotten much slower.

Draco sent a curse flying her way before she had fully gotten to her feet. She flew back into the dumpster and cried out in pain before going limp. Draco raised his wand again and Harry knew exactly what spell he was about to cast.

"DRACO, NO!" Harry yelled.

"Harry, if we don't kill her, she'll just keep coming after us!" Draco yelled back.

"She can rot in Azkaban," Harry said calmly.

"She'll just get out and come after you again," Draco said softly, he and Harry now side-by-side. "I'm not going to let her have that chance."

"And I'm not going to take the chance of either one of us ending up in Azkaban for killing her a second time," Harry said sternly. Harry held out his wand and called for the Aurors.

Instantly Tonks was at Harry's side. "What can I do for you?" she asked, not really seeing who had called.

"Death Eater," Harry said softly.

Tonks looked over at the dumpster where Donna lay, unconscious. "Abram," she said softly. "We've been trying to catch her for ages," she muttered. She looked back at Harry and Draco. "Please, for the love of Merlin, tell me she's not dead."

"She's not dead," Harry said softly. "At least I'm fairly certain she's not."

Tonks sighed. "Well, if she is, I can assure you that you won't be charged for her murder again," she said. She sighed heavily and held out her wand, calling for backup.

Another Auror appeared seconds later and helped Tonks take the Death Eater away.

"If we meet up with her again, Harry," Draco said softly, "I don't care what you say, I'm killing her. No one messes with the one I love and gets away with it."

"Well if she gets out and comes after us again, I'll help you," Harry said softly. "What do you say we go home?"

Draco sighed heavily. "Gladly," he said.

Donna Abram was given the Dementor's Kiss the next morning.

_This will be the very last entry in this diary. I've finally realized what it's going to take to put Harry on his guard. I'm going to give him this, though I have no idea if it will help him or not. I have no idea if he'll be able to read this because I'm fairly certain that they've put a spell on me to ensure that I don't tell him what happened. I think that's why I can never say the words._

_I always knew it was going to take something drastic to open his eyes. I'm going to give my life to help save his. Suicide. I know they say that suicide's not the answer and that problems are never permanent, but I know that in this case, I have no other way to tell Harry that something's wrong. I have no other way to alert him to the fact that things are not as they seem. I can only hope he doesn't hate me for this._

_Merlin, save him, because I couldn't._


	10. Epilogue

Hermione's Suicide

Epilogue

It had been a year to the day that Hermione killed herself. Harry sighed as he sat down at his desk in his quiet home outside of Hogsmeade. The year had been long and trying. He had survived his best friend only to be faced with death threats—and attempts—Death Eaters who pretended to be trustworthy professors, headmasters who had been kept under the control of a nearly undetectable potion, three weeks in Azkaban Prison, and, to finish it off, the death of Lord Voldemort. Harry's injuries were still healing.

Harry sighed again and opened the middle drawer on the left side of the desk and pulled out a small, brown, leather book. He opened it and skimmed through the pages, exposing a neat, cursive handwriting. Hermione's handwriting. She had recorded her thoughts faithfully every night for eight months before she'd killed herself. Her last entry, to Harry's knowledge, had been the day before she'd killed herself, but as Harry turned the last page, he saw an entry he had never seen before.

_Dear Harry,_

_I don't know what to say to you to get you to understand why I did what I am about to do, and in all honesty I don't expect you to. I want you to know that I did this only so that I could open your eyes because I couldn't say what was going on._

_I don't know if you know by now or if you're learning this for the first time, but I have reason to believe that Professor Abram is going to try and have you killed. I need to open your eyes, Harry. I need you to see that you can't trust anyone—not even Dumbledore, because I know he's in on it as well._

_You're my best friend, Harry, and I would do anything for you. That is why I'm about to end my life. I can't stand by and do nothing when I know that you're in danger. I can't stand by and watch you get hurt and I'm not going to._

_Be weary of Ron as well, Harry. Abram and Dumbledore were talking about using us to get to you. If we tell you to go somewhere alone or with just us, don't do it. If you die, I know for a fact that Voldemort will win and I can't allow that. Just as I can't allow you to be hurt._

_I love you Harry, you're like the brother I never had. You're definitely my family. I wish things could be different, that I could be there with you now, celebrating with you as you live your life and plan your future with Draco—you can't fool me, I know there's something there. I wish I could be there to give you a hug when you do finally defeat Voldemort. I wish I could be there with you every step of the way, but I'm not going to sacrifice your life for my own selfish desires._

_Love always,_

_Hermione_

Harry felt a tear fall down his face as he read the letter. Her goodbye. She had killed herself to save him. She had given everything for him and he had no way to pay her back for it.

"If you can hear me," he whispered, looking up at the sky through the window in front of him, "thank you."

"What did you say?" Draco asked from the other side of the room.

Harry shook his head, tears still falling. "I was just thanking Hermione for the one thing I can't thank her enough for," he said softly.

"What?" Draco asked.

"My life," Harry whispered.

Harry felt as though someone had just wrapped her arms around him and knew Hermione had heard him. He tightly closed his eyes and sucked in a shaking breath before more tears fell.

"Harry?" Draco asked.

Harry wiped away his tears and opened his eyes to look at his lover. "Sorry," he said with a weak attempt at a smile. "It's just that it's been a year and…"

Draco shook his head and silenced Harry by placing a finger over his lips. "There's no need to explain," he said softly. "I understand completely." With that, he wrapped his arms around the man who saved the lives of so many and kissed him softly.

"Will you marry me?" Harry asked.

Draco let out a chuckle that was half of a sob. "Yes," he said, feeling his own tears fall.


End file.
